Gabrielle O'Hare

When I hit my mid-40s I was hit by uncontrollable cravings.

Uncomfortable crawling sensations deep inside me, which I couldn't ignore. A monster which needed feeding, but no matter what I ate, the beast wanted more. I kept eating to find that one thing which would make the feeling go away, but I could never find it.

Embarrassed by the constant need to eat, I sneaked in food when no one was looking. My tightening clothes were a constant reminder of what these cravings were doing to me. And it wasn't just the weight that was a problem. I never stopped thinking about food. My mind whirred in an endless loop of planning meals, trying to figure out what I could eat that didn't have many calories, looking for opportunities to sneak something in, feeling guilty for what I'd eaten, and then planning my next diet or fast to make up for my binges. It was exhausting.

I was desperate to break the cycle, and the only way I knew how was to go on a diet. I tried diet after diet, but I’d only manage a couple of weeks before my cravings got the better of me.

The problem was that diets only told me what I should be eating. I was passionate about nutrition and had been learning about it for years, so I knew what a healthy diet looked like, the problem was I couldn't stick to one. Whatever I read about cravings didn't work. Was I the only person struggling like this? It certainly seemed like it. I felt completely alone, shamed by my guilty secret.

A couple of years later, life took a few uncomfortable turns. I lost my job, my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer and lockdown started. It felt like the rug had been pulled from under me. In the midst of uncertainty and despair, I realised that my health was the most important thing I had.

I decided to retrain as a personal trainer and look for the answers myself. As soon as the gyms reopened I was fully booked, mostly by women over 40 who wanted to lose weight. As I got to know my clients I realised they all wanted to eat healthier diets, but suffered with cravings and their willpower and motivation often fell short. Interestingly they also blamed themselves and had no idea that other people shared the same struggles.

A distinctive pattern was emerging and the same issues cropped up again and again, and the idea for my book was born!

I wanted to stop women thinking it was their own fault they were failing The only way to do this was by shining a light on the real reasons we struggle. When we finally understand what's really holding us back, we find a way to move forwards.

This book will help you understand why you are finding it hard, and show you exactly what you need to do to eat a consistently healthier diet and create a healthier relationship with food.

You can find our more on gabrielleohare.com or follow me on Instagram @gabrielle_ohare

I continue to work as a personal trainer, specialising in strength training for women over 40.

At weekends I am outside as much as I can (housework often takes a back seat!). My partner and I are training for a cycling holiday in the Alps. I am a nervous, novice cycler. I got knocked off my bike when I was 19 and spent the summer on crutches, but I am slowing facing my fears because I want to have more adventures in the not-too-distant future as my daughter becomes more independent.