Ralph Oppenheim

“Write a novel, lose a friend,” is at-will rodeo clown king Ralph Oppenheim’s motto. Descended from three generations of rodeo clowns, Oppenheim wrote the comic romance, The Best Escapade, while recuperating from ‘man-in-the-bouncing-barrel syndrome’, an occupational hazard. The Best Escapade was a surprise hit in Australia published under the title La Migliore Scappatella. Mr. Oppenheim wrote The Unhappiest Boy in America because he is convinced America is yearning for a great novel about soapbox derbies. Mr. Oppenheim is rarely wrong when it comes to the zeitgeist but has an uncanny knack for dating the wrong women. His most recent book, Remain Steadfast, was inspired by a visit to the National Helium Reserve in Amarillo, Texas. Mr. Oppenheim has frequently been likened to the strategic gas reserve. Speaking of gas, Mr. Oppenheim wishes to set the record straight: he was, indeed, the originator of the expression, "He who smelt it, dealt it."