Ponk Vonsydow

I wrote my first novel in seventh grade called The Massacre Massacre, but the manuscript was confiscated by a teacher who took it to the principal. They were alarmed because I had used real students of my school, as well as staff, as victims of the psychotic killer in the book. The result was they forced me to see a psychiatrist. Somehow everyone failed to notice that a seventh grader had written an entire novel, but the headshrinker did notice and told them there was nothing to worry about and they should be more concerned with what to do with a literary child prodigy. Evidently he liked my little book. Unfortunately they never gave the manuscript back. Soon after I dropped out of high school to pursue a career as an artist. Later I tried to go to community college but became disillusioned by my creative writing teacher. She asked the class to write a short story about how people eat. My story was about cannibals eating human beings. She gave me an F. Then she asked the class to write a short story about how people walked. I turned in a story about someone that didn't have any legs. She gave me an F for that one too. Then she asked the class to write a story about an artist. My story was about a schizophrenic man that could only paint pictures of dead kittens. Another F. I realized I was being punished for content, something that remains true to this day, as one literary agent took time to explain my titles were the most un-commercial books he had ever heard of and the local writers group where I live voted me off the island saying they couldn't fathom my work. In any case, I wrote my first novel "Nothing's Worse Than A Clown Gone Bad" in 1993 and after finally getting a word processor, (remember the lame old days before those things?) typed it into the machine and edited it. I started querying literary agents and publishers in 1999 and continued to query various agencies since then, but have only been rejected, running now fifteen years. I no longer query such people. I now have 130 novels and novellas, one non-fiction booklet, and one novelty book completed.