Witches Anonymous

Scrubbucket was the worst and most silly witch you could ever imagine. In fact, if you closed your eyes and imagined the worst possible witch ever and then the silliest - you would get some idea of what she was actually like. Join Scrubbucket and others in this enchanting tale, which will hold you spellbound, from the first page to the last.

Scrubbucket was the worst and most silly witch you could ever imagine. In fact,if you closed your eyes and imagined the worst possible witch ever and then the silliest - you would get some idea of what she was actually like.
Instead of a black witch’s hat, she wore a very dark green one, which was bad enough because, as everyone knows, witches have to wear black hats. It is generally recognised by the witching world and the rest of the world that a witch wears a black pointy hat.
But then Scrubbucket didn’t like rules, or hats, at all; so she decided that she didn’t really need one anyway. After all the design hadn’t changed since the sixteenth century and she was a very young, modern witch, not some ancient, batty old lady from the earlier days. So she had decided she would put her hat into the pot. Surely the power of the hat, if it had any at all would be transferred to the pot, and it would make her potions and spells even more powerful than they already were....
But no, the pot just bubbled and bubbled, and the contents blew up, and covered the whole cellar with a horrible greeny-coloured slime.
The cellar looked even more of mess than it had before; but after a few hours, when it had dried, it gave the cellar that lived-in look, a certain slob-like look, 'I haven’t changed my socks for days' look - just the sort of image Scrubbucket wanted to create for herself.
Of course, there are good witches as well as bad ones. The good ones use their knowledge and wisdom to make the world a better place and they are wise and caring and are generally very well respected members of the community. Unfortunately Scrubbucket was not one of these; she actually liked being bad. Not that she was really bad; she was just, well, a little misguided and felt being good was far too dull and boring.
She had decided she would form a group of very specialist witches, an elite group called Witches Anonymous - definitely no hats and definitely no being nice! This elite group would be made up of the most horrible and worst witches in the neighbour-hood. However, as Scrubbucket was by far the worst and most ridiculous of all the witches, the others just laughed; after all it was just another one of her silly ideas. So she became the only member.
All the other witches were quite content and very happy making their herbal remedies and making lots of money, which meant they were able to buy nice houses and live in reasonable luxury with the added prospect of retiring on a very, very good pension.
So there was Scrubbucket, left all alone to cause mayhem and disaster to all that came into contact with her - not that many people came into contact with her; in fact, most people avoided her like they would avoid the plague. Of course there were exceptions, such as the widow Mrs Merriman. She owned the house where Scrubbucket lived. She was a kind, gentle soul, and a very patient person, but even she had had enough and was really fed up with Scrubbucket, and she wanted her to move out.
All the other tenants that had lived in her house had already moved out - they were sickened by the strange noises and funny smells arising from the cellar from the huge mistakes that Scrubbucket often made when brewing potions. One such mistake resulted in a plague of spiders overtaking the neighbourhood when one of her spells went really badly wrong. Not that any of her spells were ever really successful, but this one in particular was most gruesome, as the spiders were really quite large, the size of a small saucer, and they were green and yellow and blobby-like, in fact they were well, quite disgusting! There were hundreds of them, they foamed at the mouth and chased people around, trying to bite their ankles with their large jaws. Spiders do not usually try to bite people’s ankles, but then, they don’t usually have large jaws with enormous teeth, either. One of them had dropped from the ceiling and fallen into Mrs Merriman’s porridge. The porridge suffocated the spider of course, but not before giving poor Mrs Merriman a severe panic attack and she never ever ate porridge again.
Fortunately for everyone Scrubbucket’s spells didn’t last longer than about ten minutes, and all the spiders then exploded in a puff of green smoke.