Matt Edward’s story began when he was a high school freshman. After a clinical procedure, he received a prescription for Vicodin. He felt “touched by God” after taking the first pill and was never the same. Shortly before his death, Matt told his mother, “If anything happens to me, my journals will explain everything.” They do.

What I Couldn’t Tell You is a diary of Matt’s life until his death at age 25 from an overdose. Matt paints a self-portrait of a young man who’s intelligent, articulate, and full of dreams, and who wishes more than anything to break his curse so he can find love and acceptance. His journal presents a fascinating look at the culture, shame, isolation, and frustration of addiction. Though Matt takes responsibility for his predicament, his experiences make it clear that addiction is a societal problem. Friends and family, the legal system, the medical system, pharmaceutical companies, spiritual institutions, treatment
centers, societal biases, and other factors fuel the cycle of dependency.

Matt’s journal entries are interspersed with insightful commentary by his mother, Jane Funk. Readers gain valuable insight into addicts and society through daily drug intake records, surprising avenues for drug access, and grievous failures by those charged with helping addicts recover. Addicts are full of love, and are desperately seeking someone to accept love, yet are heartlessly dominated and disenfranchised.

If you want to help fight the addiction epidemic at home or on the streets, What I Couldn’t Tell You will give you the truth addicts rarely reveal.

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