Regardless of what your current financial status is - whether you areon welfare or extremely financially wealthy - if you are unhappy withyour life, this book is intended to help you become happy about who youare, where you are, and what you are. From Welfare to Wealth is an inspirational memoir that chronicles the life of the author as a child living on welfare, to adulthood where she was able to amass wealth simply by following tried and true methods of positive thinking and living. The author shares her stories of trials and triumphs, while also offering wisdom that will take you from a welfare mentality to a wealth mentality. Once you have reached the climax of this book, your mindset will be different. You will have quite a few new tools that will take you through the remainder of your life peacefully, with thanksgiving and a knowing that with God, you are in command of your life. You will have obtained a mental wealth called Faith, which will carry you through any tribulation that life throws upon you. From Welfare to Wealth gives you the assurance necessary to cease from living a life of regret, and start living a life of thanksgiving and promise. Learn to live life abundantly with From Welfare to Wealth. As you will find, the possibilities lie within you.
From Welfare to Wealth
A True Testimony of Faith and The Power of Positive ThinkingBy Veronica L. ReedAuthorHouse
Copyright © 2010 Veronica L. Reed
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4490-3126-8Contents
Introduction...........................................................................................................................................................................xiChapter 1: My Life With Welfare ... The Beginning......................................................................................................................................1Chapter 2: 69th and 74th Streets.......................................................................................................................................................6Chapter 3: Daddy's House and The Year that Changed My Life.............................................................................................................................10Chapter 4: Junior High School Passion and Alterations..................................................................................................................................16Lesson I: Take from life those experiences that make you a better person, because every one of us has the ability to demonstrate goodness in some way-our own way.Chapter 5: High School and Independence................................................................................................................................................25Lesson II: Determination will influence your destiny.Lesson III: Dream it, believe it, and you shall see it!Chapter 6: Life-Changing Experiences...................................................................................................................................................34Lesson IV: Children are people too.Chapter 7: High School Passion.........................................................................................................................................................41Lesson V: Life is truly what you make it, by what you desire.Lesson VI: To live is to give.Chapter 8: Fear and Turning Points.....................................................................................................................................................52Chapter 9: A Potential Roadblock.......................................................................................................................................................62Chapter 10: My College Beginnings......................................................................................................................................................66Chapter 11: College and More Turning Points............................................................................................................................................72Lesson VII: Optimism and Intrinsic Motivation are Keys to SuccessChapter 12: Life Beyond College........................................................................................................................................................77Lesson VIII: God always places people around us to help guide us.Chapter 13: More College, and Then AIDS................................................................................................................................................83Lesson IX: God gives us all freedom of choice and free will.Chapter 14: A Blessing and a Curse.....................................................................................................................................................87Lesson X: Everything happens for a reason.Chapter 15: Learning How to Forgive....................................................................................................................................................93Lesson XI: Focus on that which is positive.Chapter 16: Graduate School............................................................................................................................................................96Lesson XII: Life is about helping and encouraging others to reach their fullest potential.Chapter 17: AIDS and Willpower.........................................................................................................................................................103Chapter 18: Life After Someone Else's Death............................................................................................................................................108Lesson XIII: Motherhood and womanhood are responsibilities that shape the future for a lifetime.Lesson XIV: "We become what we think about."-Earl NightingaleChapter 19: Time to Move On to A New Adventure.........................................................................................................................................119Lesson XV: Life is about sacrifices.Chapter 20: The Work/Career "Life Cycle"...............................................................................................................................................125Chapter 21: Obtaining Work/Life Balance................................................................................................................................................128Chapter 22: Deciding Which Way to Turn.................................................................................................................................................133Lesson XVI: Always turn to your Spiritual MakerChapter 23: We Can Make Life What We Want It To Be.....................................................................................................................................138Lesson XVII: See yourself not as someone in need, but someone with the power to help others.Chapter 24: From Family Pain to Great Endeavors........................................................................................................................................149Lesson XVIII: Faith is knowing that the things, which you cannot see, truly can and will exist.Chapter 25: For Closure and Inspiration.... Be Inspired................................................................................................................................160Final Lesson: As you share your talents with the world, the world will share its talents with you.Author Insights........................................................................................................................................................................165On Buying and Maintaining Real Estate..................................................................................................................................................165On Depression..........................................................................................................................................................................170On Life and the Gift of Giving.........................................................................................................................................................178About God..............................................................................................................................................................................181Recommended Reading and Listening......................................................................................................................................................185Appendix...............................................................................................................................................................................187Acknowledgments........................................................................................................................................................................191
Chapter One
My Life With Welfare ... The Beginning In 1968, when my mother left Summit, Mississippi and migratedto Los Angeles, she had just filed for divorce and was also pregnantwith her husband's last child, my sister Peggy. Since she had nohusband and no job, and was merely looking for a way out of hermiserable marriage and a new start on life, she applied for welfare.This is how my life with welfare began. Three years after comingto California, my mother gave birth to her 5thand final child ... me.
And since she was unmarried and unemployed, she was still eligiblefor welfare.
My experience growing up on welfare is what made me realize,even as a kid, that I wanted no part of welfare when I grew up. I canremember vividly the day in particular that made me despise welfare,and vow that I would never rely on such a system to raise my family,should I ever have one. It happened when I was in the fourth or fifthgrade - a time in my life when I battled with shyness and sensitivity,especially when I had to participate in something I wasn't fond of.
That day, some of my classmates and I were selected to participatein our school chorus for the upcoming holiday program. After lunch,we were sent to the auditorium where we were under the supervisionand guidance of the music teacher, Ms. McDaniel. During themusic rehearsal, the remainder of our class was having a lesson onsafety, which was being led by some special visitors from our local firedepartment. Of course my other classmates and I were going to missthis valuable safety lesson because we had to go to the auditoriumfor music. As irony would have it, my interests at the moment weremore powerfully on safety than music.
I have no idea why I felt so strongly. But I did. So I battled withmy shyness, pulled together all my courage and marched up to Ms.McDaniel. "Please," I asked her, "Can I be excused so I can go backto my class and learn about safety?"
Ms. McDaniel frowned down at me. She loved music, so shedidn't appreciate nor understand my request - and took the libertyof letting everyone in the auditorium know how she felt about it. Sheyelled, "You want to learn about safety instead of music? What kindof sense does that make?"
Naturally I felt shattered. Through the remainder of music class,I sat counting the minutes until I could escape and go home.
When school was dismissed, two of my best friends, La Keeshaand Kathryn (who had witnessed my embarrassing moment), walkedme to my mother's car with great empathy. When we got to the car,I explained to my mother, through teary eyes, the horrible experienceI had just had. Unfortunately this event happened to have fallenon either the 1st or the 15th of the month, the two days that welfarechecks were issued. My mother had received her check.
"I've got to go somewhere, and I'm in a hurry," she told mebrusquely. "I don't have time to deal with your little music-teacherthing."
Kathryn and La Keesha looked at each other and shrugged theirshoulders - they knew that this was as far as it was going to go. Mymother hurried me into the car and off we went to Bank of America'sL.A. Industrial Branch on Gage Avenue and Avalon Boulevard, soshe could cash her check.
That day had a tremendous impact on my life. For as long as Ilived on this Earth, I would see to it that I didn't ever need to rely onwelfare to take care of myself. Because at that moment, as a nine- orten-year-old who just wanted a little reassurance that I hadn't doneanything wrong to deserve Ms. McDaniel's yelling, I had been madeto feel that a welfare check was more important to my mother thanI was. From that day forward, the mere mention of "welfare" mademe feel resentful.
Now, as I look back on that day, I am elated that it happened.This incident alone gave me the strength and determination that Iwould not allow any form of governmental assistance to take care ofme. That moment also played a role in my desire to give my futurechildren (should I ever have any) the attention they deserved. Notthat my mother was being a bad mother - she wasn't. I understandnow that she just wanted to beat the crowds to the bank, so she couldmake it home in a timely manner to get dinner going and completeher other motherly duties for the day.
I need to make an important point about welfare. At thisparticular time in American history (back in the 70's and early 80's),if you were an adult receiving welfare, your view of life was probablya bit tarnished and non-motivated. Since you were not allowed towork, be married, or have an adult male living in the home, youroutlook on life was probably quite dismal at times, because your onlymeans of receiving this minimal amount of income was throughhaving children. The more children you had, the more income youwould receive.
Considering that welfare was a form of "governmental assistance,"I ask the question, "What other forms of income was welfare assisting?"Bearing in mind that "assistance" is a form of the word "assist," let'sexplore the meaning of this word. According to the Merriam-WebsterOnline Dictionary, the definition is "to give usually supplementarysupport or aid to." Supplementary means that something is added, orprovided in addition to. So if welfare was considered "governmentalassistance" and the mother seeking welfare could not be working,married or have any type of male provider living with her and herchildren, would it have been ok for this mom to have had a "female"provider in the home? All right, we won't go there, but do you seewhere I am going with this? According to the rules, there was nopossibility that the mother could have any other income, so why thenwas welfare considered "government assistance"?
Was it considered to be in addition to the "food stamps" thatanyone on welfare could also receive? But food stamps are notincome. So a more appropriate term for welfare back then shouldhave been "government income," because as a mother receiving itduring this time, this was your job. All applicants were welcome,and encouraged to apply because, whether you were a novice motheror a professional one, all were accepted as long as you did not haveany other "legal" methods of generating income to help yourself andthe family you were attempting to raise.
Now if that wasn't a backwards and demoralizing system, I don'tknow what is! Can you understand now why I despised such asystem? Hopefully you do.
However, Mama was more enterprising than many welfaremothers at that time. She utilized her free time to volunteer at ourelementary school. For as far back as I can remember, my motherhad served as president of the Parent-Teachers Association (PTA) atSixty-Sixth Street Elementary school in Los Angeles, which is whereall of my siblings and I attended during our elementary years. Mamawas very active with both the PTA and the Advisory Council fromthe mid 70's to the early 80's. These were parent organizations of theLos Angeles Unified School District that allowed parents to have anactive voice in their child's education. Mama did this faithfully untilI graduated from Sixty-Sixth Street School in 1983.
Chapter Two
69th and 74th Streets Fortunately, Mama did have other "unofficial" financial assistancefor our family. This was provided by my father, Clark. "Daddy," as Iaffectionately called him, had always been there for Mama ever sinceshe was pregnant with me. He had his own home that he owned inLos Angeles and therefore did not live with us. But he did spendmany days and nights at our home.
During our earliest time in Los Angeles, Mama and I, plus mybrother Charles and my three sisters-Margaret, Tanya and Peggy- all lived in a home that Mama rented. First we lived in a duplex on70th Street between Main Street and San Pedro Street. A few yearslater Mama found a bigger house to rent in a noisy neighborhoodaround the corner on 69th Street. That was where we lived for mostof my elementary years.
The 69th Street community consisted of African-American andHispanic families with both young and teenaged children. Mostof us would spend many of our non-school hours playing with eachother uproariously up and down the street. With this mixture of agesand cultures, 69th Street was always lively to say the least.
One Saturday or Sunday afternoon, my sister Peggy was chasingme in front of our house, between the street and our front yard. AsI ran across the sidewalk, I collided with Derrick, a teenager wholived up the street, as he rode his ten-speed bike. Mama had to takeme to the hospital with a broken leg. When we returned home, mysiblings and a few of the other kids on the block all signed the caston my leg, which I thought was very cool.
Another 69th Street incident happened at the home of the familynext door to us to the west. The family consisted of the mom, herhusband Wilson, and her three children. Actually her two oldestchildren were by previous relationships, while her youngest daughterBradley was she and Wilson's child. Her son Thomas was the oldest,about 12 years of age. Everyone called him Tom for short. Hermiddle child was a daughter named Tammy, about 7 years old. Heryoungest daughter, Bradley, was about 5.
Tammy and I were neighborhood friends, so sometimes weplayed at her house and other times at mine, running back and forthbetween the two houses. Tammy's house was actually a duplex - sheand her family resided in the front and her grandmother and auntslived in the back. Her stepfather Wilson had always made me rathernervous because at times I would catch him staring at me for somereason. One day while we were playing at Tammy's home, Wilsonfor some reason wanted to give me a kiss on my cheek.
I don't recall whether it was Wilson or Tammy's mom that calledus into the room where the two of them were sitting, but Wilsonproceeded to pull me close to him in order to give me the kiss. Well,considering he wasn't my father and didn't have any relation to me, Iwasn't too cool with this. So I resisted as much as possible, pullingmyself as hard as I could in the opposite direction. Wilson was a tallman of about six feet, and quite muscular and fit, so my 7- or 8-year-oldstrength couldn't stand up to his manly power. He succeeded inlanding a kiss on my cheek, and remarked to Tammy's mom that Iwas quite strong.
But that was the last kiss he ever got from me. After that, Iremained out of dodge and never went to Tammy's house if he was athome. That incident made me very uncomfortable, and I was unsurewhether he would want to continue giving me so-called "innocent"kisses on my cheek.
When incidents like this happened, or other experiences beyondmy control that caused some sort of discomfort or trauma, whetherfor me or another person, I would become very nervous as a result.Since I don't particularly enjoy being under duress, I do whatever ittakes to avoid such circumstances. You don't have to tell me twiceto get out of the house if it is on fire.
What I learned from this experience was something that myhusband and I tell our daughter today: "Use your own brain and donot allow others to think for you."
Once other people have the power to manipulate your life, youhad better be sure that they have your best interests at heart, otherwisethis type of maneuver can potentially place yourself in an unwantedor dangerous situation. Always think for yourself and utilize theexperiences of others as guides, and you will do quite well in life.
If you are a child, then of course you must also rely on thedirection and input of your parents. However, here again, you canuse your own brain. It's risky to rely on the brains of your peers,because they don't have any more experience than you do. When indoubt, consult with an adult who has your best interest at heart, andyou will be saved from having to engage in experiences which couldbe detrimental to you and your future.
As my readers can surely tell, 69th Street rarely had a dullmoment. There was always something to stimulate the residents ofour block.
Then, just before I finished 6th grade, Mama and my four siblingsand I moved into Daddy's house on 74th Street, in the heart of LosAngeles. According to Mama, the owner of the house on 69th Streetneeded it for his daughter, who had previously been an actress, as Iremember. She was now moving back into town, therefore it wasnecessary for us to find a new home. I don't remember exactly howthe arrangements came about for us to move into Daddy's home, butthat is where we headed.
74th Street was located in an area of Los Angeles that was muchquieter than 69th Street, although it was less than a mile away.Located east of Avalon Blvd. and south of Florence Ave., it was one ofthose communities that just grow on a person. It consisted mostly ofelderly households, and was very peaceful. During the time that welived there, the feeling around the neighborhood was one of comfort.It really gave me a home-loving feeling - I wanted to stay there foras long as possible.
Chapter Three
Daddy's House and The Year that Changed My Life Daddy's house was on a modest corner lot of about 3100 squarefeet. He had lived alone for a fairly long time. His only other child,George Jr., was grown and lived in Louisiana with his own wife andson. Daddy's house was therefore quite small - much smaller thanour rental home on 69th Street. He only needed enough room forhimself, with one extra bedroom for guests. So the house's livingspace was about 800 sq. ft. with 2 bedrooms, a living room, diningroom, kitchen and one bathroom.
There were now two adults and five children in this small,2-bedroom home, which appeared to have more space in the backyardthan it did inside! So Daddy had an enclosed patio added on to theback of the house, which is where my three sisters and I slept. Iactually enjoyed our new room, which because of its new construction,encompassed the smell of new carpet. It had the pre-fabricated wallsand ceilings found in most enclosed patios in Southern California.
I really enjoyed rainy days and nights in our new room. Whenthere was a hard rain, it sounded as though there was a horse stampederunning across the roof! This never frightened me since I knew it wasjust rain. I've always enjoyed being close to nature, so the sound ofthe thunderous rain made me feel relatively peaceful inside.
It was now 1983. We had been living with Daddy for a littlewhile and had finally become acclimated to our new community. Iwas now in the sixth grade, nearing the end of my elementary-schooladventure. I recall always making A's or B's on my report card (mostof which were A's) throughout all of my elementary years.
Continues...
Excerpted from From Welfare to Wealthby Veronica L. Reed Copyright © 2010 by Veronica L. Reed. Excerpted by permission.
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