This book was developed from the collective works of Phillip Martin Williamson, Leon Vaughn Gilchrist, Jr. and Alan H. Smith who make up EASY Ink, a written-word enterprise. Many people entertain the idea of others reading their written thoughts and opinions, but are reluctant to commit them to ink because they are often intimidated by thoughts of others knowing their convictions and opinions, or simply have no forum from which to speak. A few years ago, we started a monthly publication, Easy Times as a method of placing our voice into the marketplace of ideas. Having heard from so many sources on a wide range of topics, we wanted to enter the fray in a way that would encourage others to read, think and possibly discuss rather than rage at one another with the bullhorns that seem to be the norm of today's media. Under the Surface and Beyond the Horizon is the bound collection of the ideas and perspectives shared through Easy Times.
Under the Surface and Beyond the Horizon
By Phillip Martin Williamson Leon Vaughn Gilchrist, Jr. Alan H. SmithAuthorHouse
Copyright © 2009 Phillip Martin Williamson, Leon Vaughn Gilchrist, Jr., and Alan H. Smith
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4389-9613-4Contents
Introduction..................................................................................xiiiPart I Personal Growth - Responsibilities for Myself.........................................1Chapter 1 - The Search for Clarity............................................................3Chapter 2 - Social Masks......................................................................17Chapter 3 - Joy out of Sadness................................................................25Chapter 4 - Fresh Starts......................................................................31Chapter 5 - Freedom...........................................................................38Chapter 6 - The Immaturity of the Mature......................................................44Chapter 7 - Inward Focus......................................................................48Part II Taking Care of Family - My Responsibilities to Family................................63Chapter 8 - Parenting.........................................................................65Chapter 9 - Keeping the Family Close..........................................................74Part III Taking Care of Self and Others - My Responsibilities to Society.....................81Chapter 10 - Entertainment Gone Wild..........................................................83Chapter 11 - Control..........................................................................97Chapter 12 - Expectations.....................................................................100Chapter 13 - Forgiveness......................................................................109Chapter 14 - Generations......................................................................116Chapter 15 - Giving...........................................................................124Chapter 16 - Leaders..........................................................................130Chapter 17 - Violence.........................................................................136Chapter 18 - The Virtues of Connectedness.....................................................144Chapter 19 - The Perception of Clarity........................................................159Final Thoughts................................................................................167
Chapter One
The Search for Clarity
We view situations, occurrences and concepts certain ways, but how we view them may not always be correct. If it looks like a rose and it smells like a rose, it is probably a rose, but caution must be taken. A pretty, red flower with a rose-like scent may not be a rose at all. Before settling, or coming to conclusions we need to look for the fundamental components of situations.
Who am I, and do I search with vigilance to see clearly?
Just Ask God
Leon Vaughn Gilchrist, Jr.
It forgives, cares, laughs, supports, is spontaneous, but don't be so quick to call it true love.
The relationship between two people "in love" is amazing. People who are "in love" enjoy each other's company. They giggle. They're lighthearted. They even apologize and forgive one another. When compared to all other human-to-human relationships, the relationship of people "in love" is clearly in an emotional league of its own. The spotting of a couple "in love" sends the average married (five or more years) person into emotional overdrive either fervently wishing to get some of "that" back, or with a sinister grin, predicting the inevitable end of the lovers' bliss. What is it that people in love possess? Is it love or is it an unreliable perception of love?
The question of whether it is love or something else, reminds me of a primetime television ad I once saw. Several years ago, the Memorex Company aired a television commercial advertising the high fidelity of its cassette tapes. The tagline question, "Is it live or is it Memorex?" was broadcast to millions of people with the intent to sell the idea that audio material captured on its tapes would be of the same quality as any live, audio performance from which any such recording was made; a person listening to the recorded information would, in essence, be listening to the live performance. The commercial provided no objective information proving its claim, though. It simply relied on the proven power of reoccurring visual and audio messages.
Reoccurring sights and sounds have a powerful impact on us. We see people "in love" on a regular basis. Seeing them provides our minds with images and sounds that lead to the creation of the perception that people "in love" have true love for one another. This perception stirs in us a desire for the same. What we don't realize, though, is that "in love," more times than not, is not true love, but is instead a wonderful enrapture of conditional, love-like emotions and behaviors.
My experience is that people, who are "in love," fell "in love," and sooner or later they will fall out of love. To me being "in love" is like living in an amusement park. Everything is happy and carefree until the sights and sounds cease to thrill. Love, on the other hand, is living in the real world committed to doing the things of love, for the sake of love, without having to first feel good, happy or amused. Love is also experiencing, but not always, the emotional highs of being "in love."
Every time we see a couple "in love" it's a commercial for that desired and observable state of feeling. These commercials, like the Memorex commercial, don't, however, offer any proof of dependability or reliability. What is it that people in love possess? Quite simply they possess convincing, but temporary feelings of absolute bliss that aren't too much different from a drug, alcohol or shopping high.
It is a wrong perception that being "in love" is the same as being in a relationship where both parties have true love for one another. Love is commitment. A Commitment is made with the mind and felt in the heart. Being "in love" is the euphoria of being with someone who excites you. The only connection euphoria has with commitment, though, is that it cannot be permanent: love, however is permanent. If you don't believe me, just ask God.
Identity Crisis
Alan H. Smith
Understanding and Accepting Dual Identities
Several years ago, I was traveling in Germany on business. My obligations were finished in the late afternoon on a Friday, so I opted to take an early flight on Saturday morning. Because of flight connections, I literally had to rouse myself at 4:30 AM local time in order to make the first leg of my journey. As I entered the terminal and got in line to check in, I reached for my passport in the location where I had been storing it for this trip, and found that it was not there. Thinking in the midst of an early morning mental fog, I looked in my briefcase for the missing document only to discover an empty space in its normal location. After a check of every pocket and stash location on my person, I stepped out of the terminal to the spot where the taxi had dropped me off - thinking that I dropped it when I paid the driver. There was nothing there - not even a porter to ask if he had found a stray passport laying in the drive. Having been told to never lose sight of or touch with my passport when traveling abroad, I was now in a controlled panic, but had the presence of mind to try to get to the U.S. Consulate in Frankfurt - a 40 minute flight from my current location, and the first leg of my planned trip. Since I could travel within Germany, but could not leave the country, I was allowed to take this flight, but to return to the U.S. without the passport would not be possible.
That was the beginning of a two day period in which I essentially did not exist - at least from the perspective of my nation of origin. I arrived at the consulate and talked to the Marine standing guard at the gate who did not believe I was an American citizen. Since he did not believe my story, he was not about to do anything to help me. I ended up making such a ruckus at the gate that the State Department Officer of the Day finally came down and helped me find accommodations and get to a point where I could get another passport issued the following Monday when the passport office opened again. In the meantime, I spent an additional two days in Germany - essentially without a country, and no way to get home.
As I have thought back on those two days, it was a little like being in exile - a time of forced absence from my home. But from what was I exiled? Like so many Black Americans, I bare the imprint of the years of struggle for equality. The imprint is the result of things like Jim Crowe laws that prohibited Black folks from using the same public facilities as Whites. The imprint is the result of watching American history being retold time after time with no reference to the fact that the early infrastructure of the country was built on the backs of those who lived in chains, and were treated as property. As a Black student in almost exclusively White private schools during the 60's and 70's, I had my fair share of incidents and issues to work through. I was not a student who happened to be Black, I was a black student - make no mistake about it. The imprint is the result of many things coming to bare on the human psyche as I learned to cope with the differences in life caused by my skin color. I see many issues through a lens that is different from many of my White colleagues and friends. I interpret statements, vocal tones and actions on the basis of that imprint - recalling the subtle and not-so-subtle events that have directly involved me, and those that have indirectly involved me.
As I lived through my exile however, I realized that the color of my skin was not the real issue, and essentially neither hurt, nor helped my predicament. To the Germans, I was an American - period. To America, I had no identity at all until I produced a birth certificate that proved my citizenship. I had gone from being a person with an imprint to being a person who essentially did not exist at all. As I experienced my exile, my primary thought was to return home - to America. It didn't matter whether it was black, white or green, it was home. I'm sure that those who are away and unable to return feel the same way.
So, what is the point of all of this? At its core I think the point is this: regardless of the vast differences in perspective caused by the actions of those who have come and gone before us, and the events of the past, there is one undeniable common denominator that we essentially take for granted. In the process of doing so, we miss something that could possibly be the beginning of our learning to live with the imprints that we all bare. Each year as Black History Month begins and ends, it's important to understand that Black History is in actuality American History, and though we do not all share the same perspective on it, it would behoove each of us to come to understand a truthful sense of history rather than continuing to live in a sense of social denial. The blot of slavery, the vestiges of reconstruction and racial challenges we've known in this country will forever be on record and should never be forgotten. While the images are difficult and the memories conjure up questions of when we have actually taken sufficient actions to compensate for their effects, the reality is that those same times are embedded in who we are. Great men and women of color set something of a standard for behavior, critical thinking, invention and perseverance as a part and a result of that struggle.
We - all of us - are in some measure imprinted with the residual effects of those times, and cannot be ashamed of it, but rather must learn to live with and embrace it. Despite the progress that has been made in the past 40 or so years, the concept of minorities competing and living on equal footing with the majority remains elusive, and we seem to be unable to adequately address it partly because we cannot talk about the core issues that are causing the problem in the first place. We remain unable to communicate cross-culturally in tones and manners that do not evoke unintended responses - largely because we simply do not understand one another. We don't understand one another because, for the most part, we have made no earnest attempt to understand one another. It seems that after all of this time and progress, we remain unable to speak about things in ways that will lead to constructive understanding and appreciation of the imprint that living in America has placed on both majority and minority in this country. To an extent, it's a matter of understanding who we are. African Americans, Latino Americans, European Americans and, Asian Americans have a common denominator in being American. I submit thought that few if any of us have given a whole lot of thought to what that means, how our moral and spiritual convictions bare on that meaning, and how we must live as a result.
Is this to say that we ditch our individual cultures in favor of some American culture meld? The answer is simply no. The individual cultures are what give the whole flavor. We must celebrate and remember history today for the sake of improving things for tomorrow. Let's face it; we all have a dual identity - one of our descent and the other of our nationality and both are impacted by the things that have occurred in the past. The trick is to make this thing co-exist. Is there an enduring identity crisis in America? I think there is, and it's largely because we are unable to grasp this simple truth that we cannot really deny our dual identity. We have to understand it, get comfortable with it and live with it.
Identifying with Neighbors
Phillip Martin Williamson
Identifying with one's neighbors based on outward appearances may not be wise. They may not be who they appear to be.
What may seem to be real may not be as real as we would like it to be. To some degree, if we dig deep enough, we can find a level of authenticity, accuracy, reliability, legitimacy, all that may point to semblances of real. How deep do we have to dig, though, to be certain that things are different or the same?
People will use little information to establish friendships and associations. Can it be by using our senses only that we can determine if things, situations or people are the same or different, or do we need some criteria and/or evidence to help us? It seems that we gravitate to those we think will understand who we are and like the things that we like. When there is no real indicator that distinguishes one person from another we tend to go with the obvious, how others look to us. Those who are into fashion, look at how people dress. Many judge on physical appearance and make assumptions that way.
People call each other brother based on some commonality, alliance, or some connection. But, we must be careful solidifying our connections and aligning ourselves with people who we know little about. Especially when we are judging people on what we think is true about the person. The former pastor of my former church, the Reverend J. Isaiah Goodman, said in a sermon, "You are not my brother just because you are black." What I understood from that statement is that we identify with others because of some commonality. Oftentimes the color of one's skin automatically gives the right of way into a brotherhood of some sort or entrance to a way of life. But, when Reverend Goodman spoke these words, I believe that he was not just talking about skin color, but those identifying characteristics, and in some cases, isolated common opinions that are not always identifiable, that bring individuals to kinship and camaraderie.
We are quick to attach ourselves to another person because we think they are going through the same thing as we. Or we identify with people because we believe that there is agreement of beliefs. Sometimes without basis, we come to the belief that others share our position on a topic or that we simply see the world in the same way. Belief systems and how we see the world vary with experiences; they are developed as a result of our teachings and training.
It always amazes me how frequently we look at a person and come up with a profile without knowing the person. We come to decisions on how people are based on a preconceived idea. There may be someone we've just met who looks like or shares some commonality with someone from our past. Preconceived ideas can be hindering or they can help to bring about a positive. It is a slippery slope when we judge before knowing who the person is.
Are we the same as our blood relatives? Brothers and sisters share the genetic pool. So they can look alike and learn to walk alike. They can be raised by the same parent or parents, be given the same things and opportunities growing up, but, as we discover, there will be differences. You may find differences in the levels of intelligence or congeniality, which may or may not follow bloodline. But we see what we think is, and it may not be what we think.
I find it insulting when groups of people are clumped together as if they are of the same culture, language, religion, or nationality just because they fit in a category of physical traits, and/or support a belief system. I would like to consider the people of the world. If we travel to the different countries on the different continents, we would find that many people would look the same as we do, but, we would then quickly realize that they are very different. Understanding that there are differences does not qualify the moral content of the individual or group, but just defines that there are differences.
I get a kick out of the statement that Americans act in a certain way or think in a certain way. It is just as ridiculous to think that Europeans respond to situations in one particular way or another, suggesting that there is a unified Europe and a culture that defines Europe. Generally, Native Americans, among tribes, didn't and do not all speak the same language, other than the language that has been imposed upon them by the ruling people of the land. I think of the different Native American tribes that existed and still exist today; to some they are all "Indians" but they are indigenous people to the land and each tribe has its own history, its own culture.
(Continues...)
Excerpted from Under the Surface and Beyond the Horizonby Phillip Martin Williamson Leon Vaughn Gilchrist, Jr. Alan H. Smith Copyright © 2009 by Phillip Martin Williamson, Leon Vaughn Gilchrist, Jr., and Alan H. Smith. Excerpted by permission.
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