What's Real compels light-hearted enlightening thought. It artistically visualizes life through sobering perspectives. This book expresses life through poetry. With unique themes, each poem tells it own illuminating story.

What's Real

By Aurora Phoenix

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2012Aurora Phoenix
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4685-4673-6

Contents

Lass.............................................................1Blood and Tears..................................................2Passion..........................................................3Unexplainable....................................................4Spam.............................................................5Colorless Color..................................................6Clammed Pearl....................................................7100% Legendary...................................................8Solitude.........................................................9Wired Brain......................................................10What's Real......................................................11Without Life.....................................................12Destiny..........................................................13Mood.............................................................14Constant.........................................................15There Me Go......................................................16Envy.............................................................17Pretty & Gorgeous................................................18Blues............................................................19Broken Destiny...................................................201st Love.........................................................22Iron Rod Back....................................................23Misery...........................................................24Young............................................................25Oblivion: Separation from Twin (Short Story).....................26Dust.............................................................28Sore Eyes........................................................29Silent Storm.....................................................30Ken's Peace......................................................31The Blue.........................................................32Ex...............................................................33Venom............................................................34Impatient........................................................35Mistakes.........................................................36Religious Demons.................................................38Struggle.........................................................39Human Contact....................................................40Objective........................................................41Learning.........................................................42Frank............................................................43Testimony........................................................45

Chapter One

      Lass

    The past was a blast
    A task not asked
    to enter and mass
    the life of thine
    creating
    a soul-searching lass
    (objectively) within her class

    The feelings inside, bums
    A sensation of numbness
    to overshadow and plumb
    the reality of mine
    creating
    a sobriety-paralyzing dumbness
    (subjectively) not umbrage

Blood and Tears

What does it take?
Blood & Tears
from a sister
with fears
for me and years

What does it take?
It took
Blood and Tears
to help stop these fears
for me who pierces into the years

Blood and Tears
comes from love & years
to help a sister
escape constant fears


Passion

If you have a passion
Take action
Have a goal
Don't fold
Love life
Live

Passion, a gift
Heaven sent
Properly spent
Never subsiding
Dormant or hiding

You're rich even when you're poor
With passion as a door
Find happiness, the glory of God
Pearl, pea in a pod

Passion World
A prize not won
But inborn
To blossom & grow
Aiming to become a pro


Unexplainable

Resilience, unexplainable
something inside
most definitely resides
(pushing)
to go forward and not subside

Unexplainable, resilience
something inside
against the grain
(rough)
keeps trying while
crying

Resilience, unexplainable
something inside
a plan in the making always taking
the good with the bad
making the best of what you
have and had


Spam

Old lady and her mutt
by the dumpster gut
garbage-can sluts
Digging for survival
To feed canine, Fival

She's lost her pride
Lost and tried
without a care
searching for a spare


Colorless Color

So great, a colorless black man
Wishing his pigment was a tan

So good, the status of pride
Keeping a poser at his side

So outstanding to lose his ground
A base of power he hasn't found

So surprising
ignorance uprising
enslaved by chains
Only his frame remains & his skin is stained

His soul marks time
A gift unwrapped. A prize sublime

So surprising
ignorance uprising,
enslaved,
skin stained
His soul marks time, blindness sublime


Clammed Pearl

Clammed Pearl
Lonely place
Lonely girl

Clammed Pearl
Abode for thoughts
For a distinct plot
Jewel rots

Clammed Pearl
Never lets anyone in
Love's not sin
Contains a heart
That won't reveal what's within

Clammed Pearl
Clenches emotion like a
Clam with a pearl

      100% Legendary

    100% Legendary
    For her to voice this
      its kinda scary
    100%
    That's how it's always been
    100% win & continue to
      Blend
    Legendary
    My dream and I
    She said it
      I contemplate why
    100% Legendary
    Has a lot of meaning
    To hear it once,
      the idea weaning

Solitude

Sometimes I feel alone
with just my thoughts

With no one to talk to
as a prop

Watching the water fall in a shower
Imaging tears that could
explain the pain

Sometimes I feel alone

II
Watching the water fall in a shower
Imaging tears that could explain the
patter
(of pain)

Sometimes I feel alone

III
When water falls in a shower
Imagining tears that overpower
Sometimes I feel alone


Wired Brain

Can't sleep & tired
Eyelids pried open
w/words, fluttering
like birds

Can't sleep & tired
mind keeps ticking,
don't want this habit; thus kicking

Can't sleep & tired
legs sting of exhaustion
mind running yellow caution

Can't sleep & tired
Mind smoking; rest choking

Please, (wired and tired)
brain let me rest
don't put stamina to the test
I'll start up tomorrow
the test is over
let me dream of something
like "go fetch, rover"

I'm tired
Wired Brain

Can I get a peep
(of sleep)
Stop driving my thoughts
like a jeep
over the river and thru the woods
my neck is tired
this is not good
Brain wired & tired

      What's Real

    What is normal?
    I walk. I talk.
    What's formal?
    I laugh. I cry.
    What do I feel?

    What is usual?
    I eat. I sleep.
    Is it casual?
    What is strife?
    I live. I give.
    What is life?

Without Life

What is this wall
overbearingly tall
It stands and stalls
It is insentient
dependent upon ice

II
What is this wall
overbearingly tall
It stands & stalls
It is insentient
not wanting to fall


Destiny

Hear what I say
The world is yours
destiny today
Sober play
A goddess plight
You and your might

You'll see
The life you want
ready, glee
Wait and see
Realized
A Shocking visualize


Mood

What's it like to be
what you feel

What's it like to
look at stone

What's it like to
touch ice

What's it like to
stare at a mountain

What's it like to
be invisible

What's it like
to be happy

What's it like to
be omnipotent

What's it like to
be what you feel


Constant

I have a constant in my life
if I were a man I'd call it my wife

It's there the plot in this spot
to kindle a taste
It's there this space, the universe
to quench its thirst

I have a constant that is abundant
respondent, dependent upon redundant

It's my friend I tend to send
to the world to binge and blend

I have a constant that wants my heart
and to my understanding, will not depart
it's been like this from the start

I have a constant who is abundant who insists
upon being redundant

      There Me Go

    There me go
    That conscious
    That self
    A being of what, I don't know
    There me go
    That person
    That human
    A being of thoughts; exertion
    There me go
    That who I am
    That definition
    A being of one in a million; recognition
    There me go
    That question
    That mystery
    A being of life; ambition

Envy

It gives me fire
to see other's desire
to want my expire
It gives me pleasure
to have this measure
of spark to treasure

BUT

It gives me grief
to see the master chief
of envy and
deception
It makes me sick
to see them tick
off of others' affliction
Is this an addiction

This system of motivation,
tough situation
thus, provoking consolation
Why is this the case
Should I carry mace
Is this what I have to face
I fear for my spirit's safety
If they hate me, they may try to
break me


Pretty & Gorgeous

Pretty and Gorgeous is what you are;

Embodiment of beauty; your mood; not a scar.

One in a zillion, my lucky star.

Pretty and Gorgeous: Jaaza Simone

tone; your everything, I wish I could clone.


Blues

I listen to the blues even when it's not playing.

      Broken Destiny

    I broke my heart when
      I broke his
    Loneliness, a companion of
      empty years
    We sulk & score a glimpse
      of memory
    Love unknown, a taste
      for stone
    We laugh, we weep
      a garden
      harvest of unbearable sleep
    A custom of cold & lonely
      nights, our plights
      of love untold in
      slights
    We're rich, we're broken
      we're always choking
      on loves' endeavor
      a loser's clever
      cloak & plan of
      never
    We'll never have laughing
      ever
    Ever in this life of sever
    Sever will seemingly last
      forever, ever in this
        lonely life of never
    It seems that lonely is
      the happy ever
    Broke, destined
      a lonely part
    We've love each other
      from the start
    Jealous & crazy heart
    Lonely & I will never part


      1st Love

    Those weeks w/o you
    feeling very blue
    from not hearing your voice
    I didn't have any choice

    The problem was clear
    I didn't treat you like a friend
    Every time I tried to ditch you;
    I'd only grin
    But, losing you, now I fear

    If you have another girl
    It serves me right
    And to have you back;
    I know I must fight
    You're like a precious pearl
    If I had the chance I'd
    give you my world

    I love you
    You may find it hard to believe
    My pitiful apology, I hope you'll receive


      Iron Rod Back

    I, only one, an individual
    a needle in a haystack,
    my purpose in life
    an iron rod back
    Who are you to judge me
    to label the entire race
    my purpose in life
    to enhance the intellectual pace
    seeing life's strategy
    I ain't no zero
    my purpose in life
    a positive Negro
    I do not yearn for bleach
    to whiten my skin
    my purpose in life
    to win again and again
    to want that; that success
    for all my kin
    Taught by Martin that
    There is purpose in life
    an education, a definite self
    Dreams, goals and constant strife
    With a love-stained heart
    believing in the church
    and its divine steeple,
    Martin's purpose in life
    to free a deserving race of
    people

Misery

Knowledge is misery

      Young

    As the hurt swells deep inside me
    I try to restrain the tears
    My heart aches with anxiety, envy and jealousy
    I am confused, depressed and young
    Do I forsake morality to gain a social and
    Emotional high

Oblivion: Separation from Twin (Short Story)

It felt as if someone had stabbed me a thousand times over viciously ripping my heart out leaving me unconscious. No death of friends or family or physically inflicted pain had caused the suffering that I had experienced spiritually and mentally at that moment. Provided I'm still young, maybe more heartache is yet to come. No! I'm sure it (sorrow or grief, agony or despair) will cross my path in the years to come for what is joy without pain, rain without sunshine, and good without bad? We probably would not know difference if opposition especially of good and bad cease to exist. So it is inevitable to live with the good as well as bad in order to grow, achieving maturation and wisdom or life would not be called life. If this world existed with only good, it would be paradise. If it remained with only evil, it would be hell.

She is my heart and soul much more than a best friend, marital spouse or sibling who I'd see every now and then when convenient. If she should perish by some mishap or misfortune, I might as well be burned alive, gagged by despair.

We used to talk each other to sleep every night almost for 21 years, before birth perhaps. We breathe the same air, ate the same foods and shared mostly every waking thought. She is apart of me. I find myself talking to her when she's remotely stashed 2,000 miles away, out of my reach, my sight and seemingly out of my life. I hurt deeply, for part of me is gone (temporarily or permanently). I know not what the future bears. I feel like we will never be together again.

I do not feel like a whole person. My existence has seemingly lessened, but not possibly through the eyes of others. Well I renege that statement, because we were sort of like peanut butter and jelly, fric and frac, milk and cereal, sock and shoe ... etc ... others considered us an inseparable pair. When you'd see her, I was always somewhere near.

Diving hard into a sense of oblivion, I feel as if I'm lost without personality and face. My insecurity has taken over for my soul is divided. I feel invisible like no one slightly detects my physical presence. It is when I'm with her that I'm noticed, that I exist, that I have spirit, that I am, so my mind leads me to believe.

      Dust

    Undeveloped and bodiless
      Please let me live
    I'm not yet an embryo
      merely the size of a speck of dust
        Give me the chance you had to live

    You do not know me
      So don't act like you hate me
        Please, I beg of you. Heavenly
          Father will take care of me

    Just don't take away my rights
      I'm not a mistake
        I was meant to come to this earth

    Haven't you ever heard of adoption or
      Extended family care, anything besides
        sucking me out of complete
          existence

    Don't be selfish
      Think of the gift of life
    Still, the decision is on you
      even in face of rape or incest
        whatever the case maybe
    Only you can do what you really feel is right
    Always think of the welfare of you and Me


      Sore Eyes

    Sleep will perhaps give her sore eyes rest
    She had done her absolute
      Her offspring barely salutes
      All of her efforts in vain
        What a shame

    Who is there to control the pain
      It resides for unconsciousness to tame


      Silent Storm

    It feels like rain
      The pain that stings and stains
        It pangs and clangs

    On the inside
      It pours
        It's torture


      Ken's Peace

    Aren't the angels watching
    Can't they stop the pain
      and suffering
    This agony burns a hole right
      in the center (soul)
    Not only disturbing
      internal peace
    But the desiring hearts
      of the ones who long for his well being
    Can't they see
    Maybe God wants this to be!
    And his soul will soon be free!
    I just want his turmoil to cease
    He said it himself
      he just wants peace
    I love him so, but if he must go
      please, let him have peace!
    A vision of his afterlife
      so serene and divine
    It's inevitable
      He'll be the perfect Saint

(Continues...)

Excerpted from What's Realby Aurora Phoenix Copyright © 2012 by Aurora Phoenix . Excerpted by permission of AuthorHouse. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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