CHAPTER 1
THE POWER MODEL SYSTEM
You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it true. You may have to work for it, however.
Book of Illusions
PART 1 A Faster and Straighter Path Birth of the Power Model System
Years ago, I thought I needed to hear what other people thought of me and then follow their suggestions. In fact, some of that reasoning still rings true for me today. But often those external observations simply didn't fit, and I didn't have the self-esteem or wisdom to recognize the difference between a rebellion of someone's advice verses knowing who I was. Meaning I did not know myself well enough to determine if someone's critique of me was correct or not. I didn't have a system that would allow me to discover my feelings, thoughts, spiritual beliefs, and resulting actions —a model I could plug my information into and decide what I wanted to change or leave alone.
I also didn't have a system or the tools that would allow me to bring forth all the information I had learned and recreate a new internal system that was cohesive and that worked for me. (Each of us has an internal system that defines how our four human components (physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual) connect and interact with each other.)
Self growth methods I explored in the past included affirmations, grief work, twelve step, and recovery programs. I made progress going into recovery for codependency and work addiction, and that progress eventually led me to teach college-level classes to people recovering from major difficulties in life. This experience gave me insight into our four human components that are part of all of us, and assisted me on this phase of my journey. At one point, I can remember saying with finality, "Now I am okay."
But still, I knew something was missing; growing up seemed just too difficult for others and myself. I knew there had to be a faster, straighter path to maturity.
I wanted something visual, a step-by-step guide, so I would know if I was making progress and could keep track of my own growth throughout the years. I wanted a system I could practice and take wherever I went. I wanted it to work for me time after time. I wanted a system that had a sense of internal balance so that with continuous use I could re-pattern how I thought, felt, and perceived the world and the people in it. While experiencing my soul's journey, I wanted to know my purpose and fulfill it. Ultimately, that meant I would have to stop reacting when life offered me challenges and, instead, act according to my purpose—to become all that I could be. I spent years compiling information, working with myself and my clients to develop The Power Model System. Once I applied it to myself, I became aware of issues that hindered my growth. I was able to make my own adjustments and listen to feedback from others without my insides going crazy. The system brought rapid results, in terms of increasing internal motivation and making permanent changes in behavior. I could re-pattern my brain and change my future. As I matured (don't confuse age with maturity!), so did The Power Model System[TM].
INVISIBLE FORCE
"Invisible force" is a phrase that many of the people I've worked with have used. They say to me, "Kay, I want to change, but there's something holding me back and I don't know what it is." I understand what they're saying. They're not the only ones who experience this force. I also see and hear speakers, educators, counselors, and others trying to work around, under, and through that same force with people they're trying to educate and help. Unfortunately, it doesn't yield the desired results. Because of this invisible force, people are not able to hold on to the new behaviors, knowledge, and feelings they've been taught. This invisible force continues to bring them back to their "old" selves. So the question is, why do people pay money, spend the time, and want to learn to improve themselves but when they leave with the information, they can't apply it in their lives?
I see four answers to this question:
• Every one of us has an internal system developed in childhood that only we can uncover.
• Each of us created this internal system in our conscious mind, and by our teen years it had become part of our subconscious mind.
• This system affects every aspect of our lives.
• This internal system involves four components (emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical). Until you can understand how this all affects you, it is virtually impossible to develop true maturity on a permanent basis.
So, what is this invisible force? First, let me tell you what it is not.
THE 'INVISIBLE FORCE' IS NOT:
• that you lack the desire to change
• that you've neglected to spend time and money learning how to change
• that you lack intelligence
• that you're reaching for something you can't achieve
• that you've failed to apply new information you have learned
• that you're destined to be the same way the rest of your life.
Now that we've established what it's not, let's consider what it is.
THE INVISIBLE FORCE:
• The invisible force is a lack of or imbalance of power within your emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual components
• This imbalance causes your four components to work against each other, wearing you down, rather than building you up
• With your components working against each other, you become conflicted not knowing why you are the way you are, how to change, and how to make any change permanent
• Much of this imbalance and conflict occurs sub-consciously.
THE INVISIBLE FORCE COMES FROM A COMBINATION OF FACTORS:
Environment
Automatic Reaction
Defenses
No Boundaries
Cover-up Emotions
Beliefs
The invisible force is composed of multiple factors including your environment, automatic reactions, defenses, lack of boundaries, cover-up emotions, and beliefs. You will have the opportunity to explore all of these using simple interactive activities.
KNOW THY SELF
Sense of:sense is to become aware of; perceive. To grasp; understand.
Self:one's consciousness of one's own being or identity.
Knowing: 1) to perceive directly: have direct cognition of; 2) to have understanding of importance of knowing oneself; 3) to recognize the nature of.
Deep inside, you know all the right behaviors and actions to take in order to experience the perfect relationship, the perfect career, and the perfect life. But that inner knowledge seems to be out of reach. Would you like to understand how your emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual components work together? Would you like to become aware of your strengths and weaknesses, accept them, take action on the elements you want to change, and then change them? That's right—you can actually do this yourself! After all, you're the expert on you. You have been all along.
Chances are, you're still letting that powerful invisible force—your subconscious—take over. Many decisions, reactions, and beliefs about the world are buried in your subconscious. To change or re-pattern any of these beliefs or reactions, you'll need to become fully aware of the information in your subconscious mind and transfer it into your conscious mind. In other words, you'll have to get to know yourself intimately.
Can you truly know yourself at the most intimate level? Absolutely! But to do this, you'll need to know how to move the information from your subconscious mind to your conscious mind. Only then will you be able to recreate your system of automatic responses, decisions, reactions, and beliefs. Up until now, you've been hindered by a lack of awareness of what you created in the first place. Learning to access that awareness is your goal. This is conceptually simple but not easy.
BEGIN KNOWING YOURSELF BY:
1.) acknowledging that you are the expert on you (surprise)
2.) affirming that we all possess the same physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual components
3.) affirming that we all have different life experiences and thus our components interact differently within each of us
4.) following a visual system in which you can see and record your information and progress
5.) using tools that allow self-discovery so you don't have to rely on an "outside expert" telling you who you are
6.) asking the correct questions to obtain the correct answers
7.) by allowing your answers to deliver relevant information from your subconscious mind
8.) honoring the uniqueness that you and your Higher Power created. Doing so will help you recreate a new system so that you can experience control and self-empowerment, and take responsibility for your life.
YOU ARE THE OBSERVER
As you get to know yourself, you will discover many parts of you. Sometimes you will not like what you see and other times you will be excited about what you discover about yourself. You'll be able to observe your life as if it was a movie, but it's important to remember not to judge what you find. Otherwise change will be far more difficult.
SIMPLE GUIDELINES TO BE A GOOD OBSERVER
• Observe all aspects of your physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual components without judgment
• If you find that you're judging yourself, don't judge the "judger" part of you
• If you do judge a part of you, accept it and move on
• As you create your inner observer, you'll notice your awareness level increasing with all four of your human components
• Most important, keep your sense of humor through all of this.
YOUR PERSONAL BLUEPRINT
If you are reconstructing a house, you need a blueprint of the house showing how it was built and what materials were used, i.e., concrete, wood, drywall, plumbing, electrical components, etc. When changing its structure, you refer to the old blueprints, draw up new ones, and then start making changes. If you skip ahead, you'd have a mess of mistakes to clean up. Similarly, if your car stops running and you did not know how each part works, you can not fix it until you understand its internal blueprint. Your individual internal blueprint defines how your mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual components operate and how they interact with each other. You are who you are, wherever you go, whatever you do, and whomever you're with.
The same goes for each of us. We need to refer to our internal blueprint before we can begin making intelligent choices and changes. The primary goal of The Power Model System is to help you discover your own personal blueprint which shows exactly how you function internally which is unique for everyone. You will discover much of this blueprint is how your emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual components operate and interact with each other.
YOUR PERSONAL HIGHER POWER
One powerful belief that I interweave throughout this book is that my Higher Power (as I know It to be) has been at my side since the day I was born, assisting me in my development as best It could while honoring my free will. This means that my Higher Power is fully aware of how my internal blueprint operates and how the blueprint came to be. Once I realized that my Higher Power and I had together created my internal blueprint in my childhood, I knew that my Higher Power and I could recreate a new internal blueprint. First, I needed to figure out what I wanted to change and what I wanted to keep. From there, my choices expanded, offering me more opportunities than I had ever imagined. It is my hope that you come to realize that the same is true for you.
I define Higher Power as "a source of power inside and outside of us." However, the definition of that Higher Power is completely your own choosing. It might be associated with a religion, a great prophet or teacher, or the universe itself. Some well known religions and teachers are listed below. Feel free to add to the list. This is a good time to reflect what "Higher Power" means to you personally. If you consider that you do not have a Higher Power, that is in order.
The table below is not an exhaustive list of some of the major religions that believe in a Higher Power of one sort or another:
Amish Hinduism (Hare Krishna, Shinto
others)
Baptist Islam (Mohammed) Sikhism
Baha'I Faith Jainism Taoism
Buddhism Judaism African tribal
Codas Macumba
Confucianism New Age Nature, Universe, Life
Catholic Native-American-Spirituality
Latter-Day-Saints Osho Add Others Below
Christianity (Jesus) Scientology
Unitarian Eckankar
WHAT IF I DON'T BELIEVE IN A HIGHER POWER?
This book stresses the importance of a Higher Power, not to advocate a particular belief system but to assist you in tapping into a source of power that is not likely known to you. At some point in our lives, we all experience events or challenges that seem overwhelming and impossible to overcome, yet we miraculously get through these times without ever knowing how or why. I believe we do this by unconsciously tapping into a power or ability that we don't know we have. For many, this power is associated with a religion. Even if we don't believe in a religion or God, we dig deep into ourselves and tap into an innate power, energy, ability, or sense of peace.
Those of you who don't believe in an "official" Higher Power may, for the purposes of this book, define Higher Power as some deep sense of self within you that allows you to momentarily detach from the outside world and get back in touch with yourself at a deeper level. An activity later in the book will assist you in discovering these deeper levels of your being, which you may refer to as a Higher Power.
THE "PRESENTS" FOR STAYING PRESENT
Do you knock on doors that don't open? Are you unable to see not only the doors that are open but any door? Do you know that you have day-to-day gifts? What if I told you that every day is Christmas? It's all in your perception. You might fail to recognize when an opportunity comes your way because you're not focused on the present. Instead, you're living in the past while looking toward the future. Consequently, all sense of "present time" disappears from your reality. That's what I refer to as "living in illusion," meaning that you see what you want to see and nothing more.
If you perform the various activities throughout this book focusing only on the results you want at the end, you won't give yourself credit for the self-discoveries you make along the way. Stop to appreciate what you learn during each activity, even if you don't like everything you discover. Take time to stay with your process. Read, perform an activity, think about it, and apply the information to your situation. Be completely "with" the page of the book that's in front of you. Think about similar information you've received in different ways. Most of all, resist the temptation to skip over something because you think you already know it or say to yourself, "Oh, this does not apply to me."
Many of us don't know how to learn, or if we do learn something, we forget it very quickly. So let's examine how humans learn.
