Here I am, sitting in Miami International Airport, waiting for a woman I barely know, to fly off to some barren abandoned island in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. I had found some pieces of poster board paper on the last boat I refurbished for Mr. Mach. I arranged them to where I thought they sort of made a map, to where or what I have no idea. I found the location of the island from when I stacked them up and found writings on the edges. I know it sounds crazy but my amateur archeology spirit makes me believe that if we can find anything on the island that resembles one of the pieces, then we've got a map, and the beginning of a great adventure.
MIDDLE AGE CRISIS
There and Back AgainBy C. L. COATESAuthorHouse
Copyright © 2012 C. L. Coates
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4772-7599-3Chapter One
We barely make it to the beach before the plane takes off. We watch him fly away and then look at each other, wondering what the hell we've done and if we'll ever see civilization again.
* * *
I think, "Okay, let the adventure begin." Sherry's looking out across the water like this is a joke and the plane is coming back. I start dragging things higher up on the beach. I say, "Hey, I could use a little help here. There's only three hours or so of daylight left.
She finally speaks, "Are you sure about this?"
"If I was sure, it wouldn't be an adventure! Come on, we need to get things set up before dark."
"Where do we start?"
"Fire and shelter first. Let's look for a good spot to set up the tent. Come on."
We find a spot just inside of the tree line. It's a flat sandy clearing, so we'll set the tent up here. We drag everything into the woods to the clearing. I start setting up the tent. She's just standing there with a dazed look on her face.
I say, "Why don't you gather some wood off the beach for a fire? Stay away from any animals or reptiles. Just stack it up over there."
She finally moves. I think she's in shock.
The tent goes up pretty good. It's a three room Hillary tent, like the one they used to climb Mt. Everest, or at least that's what it said on the box when I got it a couple of years ago. There, I think that's it. I've got it facing so the breeze is to the back.
Sherry's just wandering around the beach. I think she's waiting for the plane to come back. I better go help her.
"Hey, Sherry, what are you doing?" I can tell by the look on her face that she has no idea. "Come on, let's grab some of this wood for a fire, I'm getting hungry."
I grab a big armful and take it to camp. When I come back, she's still walking the beach. I grab another armload of wood and take it back to camp. I don't have the slightest idea what Sherry's doing. I can see her most of the time from the camp. I make a fire ring, set up the folding chairs and open the trunk. Wow, this thing is full. I brought two cases of beer, but I get the bottle of Crown Royal. I set two plastic glasses out and put about two shots in each glass. I find the bag of smoking stuff. I had gone to the Smoke Shop before I left and got two packs of cigarettes, two packs of cigars, papers and lighters. I grab a pack of cigarettes, papers and a lighter. Then I dig that bag of weed out of the coffee. I roll a big joint and set it out with the drinks on a box in the tent. I get the two-burner stove and lanterns out. One of the lanterns is gas and the other is a battery lantern. I set the little stove up on some drift wood.
Sherry's still walking the beach. I guess I better go get her; she's getting close to the water.
"Hey, Sherry, what are you doing?" She doesn't seem to have a clue.
"Do you see that big yellow thing in the sky? Well, see how close it's getting to the water? That means it's going to be getting dark soon. There are probably things that come out at night that you might not want to meet. The sand crabs alone can kill you. You sure you want to stay out here?"
I think that got her. I tell her to grab some wood on her way. I grab another armful because I don't know what to expect, and I want a fire. She's carrying a half-dozen pieces of wood and I'm dragging a half tree, but at least she's moving.
We get to the camp and she says, "Wow, did you do all this?"
"No, the pygmy head hunters did. They wanted us to be comfortable."
"Oh, are they coming back?"
"After we're asleep, so what do you want to do now?"
"Wait on the plane."
"I laugh and say, "Come look at the tent."
We go inside. It's like seven feet tall with a bedroom on each end. She says, "This feels safe".
"Your room's over there, mine is on this end."
"No way! We're sleeping together."
"Hey, look there."
I get the glasses of Crown Royal and hand her one. Then I get the joint and light it up. I take a couple of tokes, a sip of my whiskey and hand the joint to her. She does the same. We talk and light up a couple of times. It's probably a little before 8:00 p.m.
I say, "Come on, let's take a walk" and she says "okay". That's the Sherry I was hoping she'd be. I get in the trunk and get the two machetes that the guy talked me into buying. One's 18 inches and the other 15 inches. I hand the small one to her and tell her to put the belt around her waist and tie the strap around her leg.
"That's it, let's go."
We spend about 30 minutes covering the perimeter about 50 yards out. She has no idea we're walking in a circle. Everything looks cool. We wind up back at camp.
"Hey, look there, we're home."
"It's starting to get dark."
"Yeah, and I'm still hungry."
"How do we eat?"
"Let's finish our drinks and see what we've got."
I open the trunk. I want something quick and easy, so I'm thinking Spam and beans. I'll see what she thinks. Here we go, Spam and beans. Sounds like the best way to start. Some of this stuff isn't going to last long, like bread, veggies, eggs. I put a tank in the stove and light it up. I put a tank in the lantern and light it up, too. I only brought five tanks, I hope they last. We'll see what happens. I break out one of the mess kits. I get everything started and turn it down low. Sherry lights that joint back up.
I ask her if she wants another shot of whiskey and she says no.
I said, "You might want to dig out what sleeping stuff you have."
I brought three sleeping bags and she brought a pillow. I'll be taking that from her.
"Sherry, watch the food for a minute."
I fix us a bed in one of the rooms. I fold the third sleeping bag into a pillow. There, that will have to do.
"Is the food ready?" Great, she's spacing out again.
"Huh?"
"Here". I hand her a plate. There's catsup and everything in that bag. We eat, not bad. I ask her to bring a lantern and walk down to the water's edge with me to wash the pans. We get back to camp and I try to start a fire, but paper is the one thing we didn't bring much of. I finally get one started with the labels from the cans we used.
After sunset, I say, "Come on, let's go to bed, it's been a busy day."
I get the battery lamp, the little radio and a bottle of water. There's only one station on the radio, doesn't seem like there's much there, so I turn the radio off, turn the light off, and try to talk to Sherry.
"Sherry, thanks for coming with me."
"Thanks for asking me."
The animals are getting louder and she says, "Hold me, Larry." So I hold her until sunrise.
I get up and start a pot of water. While it's warming up, I go to the beach to look around. Nothing new. The water's hot, so I get the coffee and condiments. I use the same cups we had last night. I brought a 50 count pack but when I camp I try to be conservative, less trash.
It sounds like Sherry's waking up. Damn, looks like someone had a rough night.
"Morning, Sherry, ready for coffee?"
"Yes, please."
I give her everything and start breakfast, eggs and Spam. During breakfast and our second cup of coffee, she says, "What do we do now?"
"We pack our backpacks with lunch, water and a few other things and then explore. You need to get those new boots out and I'll get mine."
I go and wash the dishes and make us a couple of walking sticks. After we get our boots on, we look like real hikers. She asks where we start and I tell her the beach.
We go to the beach and turn right. We walk as far as we can till the beach disappears into cliffs and rocks that run out into the water. No way around it without a boat, and I didn't bring one with me. It was only a two or three mile walk. The only thing we found was an old row boat, half-buried in the sand, probably been there for years. I don't see or hear anything so we walk the edge line of the trees back. I tell her that the camp's right over there and ask her if she needs anything. She says she can't think of anything, so we go on down the beach. I wish I would have checked the island out from the sky better. We've walked this way for about three hours; it's got to be lunch time, so we stop. We have Spam and beans in a pot over a little fire and deviled ham sandwiches. After cleaning the pan and putting it in the backpack, I ask her how her water's holding out. She says it's okay.
"Let's go on a couple more hours before we turn back, okay?"
"I guess."
We walk a couple more hours and then stop to rest. If we go much further, it'll be dark when we get back. I tell Sherry to head back, that I'm going to go on a little bit. I tell her to just stay on the beach and take her time, that I'll catch up with her and to yell if she has any problems.
I head on down the beach and make good time. I find a place where the beach cuts into a nice calm cove with plenty of sea life. This place looks much nicer than where we are.
I better catch up with Sherry. At the rate I walk, I can make it back in three hours but it would take her five hours. I quick-step it back. I can tell by her footprints in the sand that she's in no hurry. After about an hour, I see her up ahead. I take to the trees and get ahead of her. When she gets close to where I am, I start making animal noises. I think she finally heard me! She's looking at the trees, and then she looks behind her, probably for me. I do my best gorilla sounds and start throwing stuff off the ground into the air and get louder. She starts yelling my name. I give a couple louder gorilla grunts and bust through the trees. She screams and takes off running back down the beach the way she came.
I yell after her, "Hey, Sherry, where are you going? The camp is this way."
She looks back as she slows down. She looks at the woods and then looks at me and starts walking back. She says, "Was that you?"
"What? What made you take off running?"
"That wasn't funny."
"What did you think it was?"
"I didn't know, but it didn't sound friendly."
"Come on, let's get back to camp."
Once back at camp, I unload the food from the back packs and put it back in the trunk. It's about 5:30p.m. I ask Sherry if she will be all right on her own for a couple of hours, that I want to explore inland.
She says, "I guess, as long as you don't go too far away."
"Okay." Why don't you pick out something for supper?"
I strap my machete back on and head out, due east, the opposite direction of the beach. I go about an hour and turn north. I look for anything described on the cards. All I find is an uphill climb and rocks. I wouldn't call it an old volcano, more like the side of a mountain. I get to the top and it kind of flattens out a little. It's a good observation point with sheer cliff walls. I look out across the water. It's a little scary because I don't see any land, north, east or west. Looking south, I can see part of the beach where we landed. I can't see the campsite. Looking across the island and vegetation, I can see a couple of clearings. Then the landscape rises to a small mountain with vegetation. I can't see anything beyond that. I can see the cove on the beach that I went to earlier in the day. I don't find anything here. No caves, nothing from the cards.
I start back to camp, taking a straight line back. It's about 7:00 p.m. She must have found something on the radio by the sound of it. I stop short of the campsite. Looks like she's got things set out for supper. Something about her seems different, more relaxed. I don't want to scare her, so I call out her name. "Sherry".
"Over here."
I step into the clearing. She comes up and gives me a kiss and a hug. "Did you find anything?"
I wonder why she asks that. "Nothing but rocks and cliffs."
"Where did you go, Larry?"
I point to the rocky cliffs.
"Oh, are you hungry?"
"Yes."
"How does chicken, noodles and instant mashed potatoes sound?"
"Great."
I start the little stove and she takes over. I start packing things for a move in the morning. By the time the food's done, all I have to do is pack the tent stuff.
"Sherry, this is very good."
"Thank you. All I used was a can of chicken, a bag of noodles and some instant potatoes."
"It's like Mom's, but I don't think that's how she does it. This is what I call doing your best with what you've got."
"It wasn't that hard."
After we eat our fill, I put the leftovers all together in a plastic container for later and to keep the animals away. Sherry heads down to the water to clean the pans. I gather wood to make a skid so I can drag everything on it to that cove down the beach.
I hear Sherry call my name in a strange voice. I go to see what she wants. I say, "What?" She points down the beach. Damn, that's the biggest lizard I've ever seen. It must be six feet long.
She says, "What do we do?"
"Nothing, as long as it doesn't bother us, unless you want to eat it?"
"God, no."
"Then we leave it alone."
I help her clean the dishes and we go back to the camp. She puts things away and I finish the skid. She asks what I'm making and I tell her a skid to drag everything on.
"Why?"
"In the morning we move."
"Where?"
"Down the beach. I found a better place."
"What about the plane?"
"I'll put the flag up there. It'll be all right."
I get in the smoke bag for a cigarette and I ask her if she wants one. She says no but she could go for a joint. I give her the stuff and smoke my cigarette. She finishes rolling it. I shove my cigarette into the sand as she lights up the joint. I pour us a little Crown Royal in glass. We sip it and smoke the joint. Then she asks, "Why are we really here?"
"Just to explore and soul search."
"Uh-huh! Then what is this?" She pulls out the cards in plastic.
"Where did you find those?"
"In the trunk while I was getting food for supper."
"Light that joint back up and I'll tell you as much as I can about it."
"Tell me all about it."
"I can't, for your own safety."
"I found them on a boat I restored that belonged to a drug dealer. Anything more would put you in possible danger. It could mean nothing. I just wanted to know. If I find something that looks like what's on the map, then we'll see."
"Do you know what's at the end of it?"
"No."
I didn't tell her about the writing on the sides. I turn the light on and let her look at it some more as I light the joint back up.
She says, "What does it all mean?"
"All I know is what you see on the cards. Now, let's go to bed. I want to move camp first thing in the morning."
I guess we both must have been tired because we went right to sleep. I get up at first light and put water on for coffee. Everything's ready and loaded except the tent stuff. As soon as Sherry comes out of the tent, I break it down, roll it up with the stuff still in it and put it on the skid. We finish our coffee and head out. It takes about three and a half-hours and it wasn't easy. I stop on the beach to look for the best place to set up the tent. Sherry says, "Are we stopping?" I look at her and wave at the skid and tell her to have at it. She grabs the handles and drags it about 30 feet and stops. I look at her and say, "Are we stopping?" She says, "All right, but it didn't look that hard when you were doing it." I say, "Let's find a good spot to set up the tent."
We go around the cove to the far end, next to the rock wall. I say, "This looks like a good spot. What do you think, Sherry?"
"This is great, no hard breezes and a wall to our backs so that lizard can't sneak up on us."
"Yeah, this is nice. A lot of possibilities. Let's look around a little more to make sure we're not next to an ant hill or spiders. I hate spiders."
We walk the perimeter. It looks good to me. No animal tracks. Let's set up the tent.
"Sherry, I'll set the tent up and make camp if you'll warm up that chicken and noodles."
"Start the stove."
I start the stove and set the tent up. It goes up pretty quickly. I gather plenty of wood. In doing so, I find a little cave. Not real big or too deep with a water pool in the back. I don't know if it's fresh water or not, but it could be a place to take shelter during a bad storm. It feels a lot cooler in here than outside, so I decide to store the food in there. I try to find out how deep the water is. I couldn't feel the bottom, but it's real cold. I can hear Sherry calling that the food is ready. I'm starved.
We sit down to eat and look out over the water in the cove. Out in the deeper part of the cove we can see sea life. Sherry says, "What is that?"
"Fish and stuff. We'll be eating some of them if I can catch them."
"Not me."
We finish eating lunch and clean the dishes. She goes to put them away and says, "Where's the trunk?"
"Oh, yeah, I found a little cave and put it in there."
"Where?"
"Get that lantern out of the tent and I'll show you."
She gets the lantern and we walk around behind the tent to the little hole in the rock wall.
(Continues...)
Excerpted from MIDDLE AGE CRISISby C. L. COATES Copyright © 2012 by C. L. Coates. Excerpted by permission of AuthorHouse. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
