CHAPTER 1

Happy Stuff

Joy

How to be happy.

1. Be you. You're already the most awesome sauce YOU in the entire universe galaxy! Shake your pom-poms baby!

2. NEVER listen to naysayers, bosses who are drunk by lunch, teachers who call you dumb, parents who worry that you're destined to be a secretary or scaredy-cat wannabees with inflated egos of their dullard reality. ALWAYS listen to strangers on the bus who talk to you or themselves, children, animals and the voices (I know you hear them too).

3. Trust your gut instinct. It tells you the truth 99% of the time. Your gut instinct creates a wonderful and peaceful feeling as opposed to the nauseous ache of the horror-filled ego – which feels like the time you ate an entire family-sized bag of ripple chips with onion dip, washed down with a bottle of red wine.

4. Make stuff up to validate your beliefs. Name your pet unicorn!

5. Be fearless. Feel Everything And Rejoice! Shake hands with your horror stories, give them a hug, have a drink with them – then make a monster face and tell them to get out (Amityville Horror style).

6. Don't play it safe. Crazy spontaneity and imaginative combustion is way more fun and it's also contagious!

7. Replace the word need with desire.

8. Embrace mayhem, madness and chaos – it is a prerequisite in the process of evolution.

9. Believe in something unbelievable, invisible and intangible.

10. Embrace your inner psychopath. Don't act on it – just tend to it.

11. Lose the attitude. Develop a lovitude.

How to choose happiness.

1. Start with smiling. It's easy and only takes 17 muscles as opposed to the 43 that it takes to frown.

2. Count your blessings: be grateful for what is yours.

3. Don't compare yourself to others. Life isn't always what it seems to be on the outside and studies show that if you put all your friends' problems in a pot, you'd pick your own.

4. Always believe that something wonderful is about to happen. Optimism is a natural breeding ground for joy.

5. Choose it! Happiness is a choice. It's an option. Happiness can be your outlook, perspective, attitude and altitude.

6. Happiness isn't a constant state of being. There has to be both rainy and sunny days. Just try not to let the bumpy days linger. Feel. Deal. Heal. Work through your worry, anger, disappointment, sadness and hurt. Forgive, let go and make peace.

7. Think happy to create happy. Plant giggles, memories, dreams, wishes and joyful jellybeans of glee in your mind. Paint your walls orange, wear yellow and surround yourself with molecules of magic, beauty and joy.

8. Do what makes you happy. Dance, sing, make art, crank the tunes, cook, laugh, play and always be true to yourself.

9. Money doesn't buy you happiness but being comfortable with your bills and lifestyle contributes to a happier you. Budget your coin responsibly so you have some leftover to play with.

10. Invest in friendships. Get a pet. Share. Do something nice for yourself and for someone else.

11. Do the hokey-pokey, hum, toss lucky pennies into the street and for goodness' sake – wear your rainbow wings.

How to make someone feel good.

1. Make an effort to know what their favourite things are.

2. Surprise them with a coffee, donut or unicorn sticker.

3. Acknowledge their birthday, good hair day, cool outfit or smarty-pants effort.

4. Pay attention to them. Listen to them. Be interested. Remember stuff they say. Ask questions. Give a shit.

5. Let them into your world. Rant, rave, smile and share.

6. Be the first to say "good morning", "hi", "how ya doing?" or "I'm sorry".

7. Send an email, make a phone call, leave a smiley post-it note.

8. Do random gestures of kindness ... just because.

9. Put their needs first. Have their back. Be their cheerleader.

10. Smile, hug them, make them laugh or do an interpretive dance to express your feelings for them (aka make them laugh).

11. Make them feel like they matter. BTW – everyone matters.

How to be wonder full.

1. Be insatiably curious. Find out what's in that secret locked closet. Dip pickles in butterscotch and discover what makes an elephant giggle.

2. Dare yourself on a daily basis.

3. Imagine the unimaginable.

4. Covet brand-spanking new experiences, strange strangers, awkward situations and out-of-the-box, out-of-your-mind adventures.

5. Choose the path less travelled and get lost.

6. Expect the unexpected.

7. Amp up your molecular adrenaline. Surprise, shock and mildly scardiate people. Keep them guessing.

8. Be remarkable. Save worms on the pavement.

9. Admire someone and live up to their super star status.

10. Experience life to the fullest. Suck a jellybean until each grain of ambrosial-infused sugar dissolves, sending your senses into a candy euphoria!

11. Hunt for the pot of gold at the rainbow's end. Reach for the stars on your tippy-toes, oh so high. Trust that when you least expect to find it ... you will.

How to engage your inner child.

1. Wrap a towel around your head and pretend that it's your hair.

2. Throw a temper tantrum. Even better – do it in public.

3. For starters – rock your pigtails, jump in puddles, walk like a penguin, eat peanut butter, grapes & hotdog sandwiches and always colour outside the lines.

4. Reunite with your invisible best friend. I love you, Bobo!

5. Wear polka dots and stripes at the same time and add bunny ears for a little extra flair.

6. Embrace everything like it's your first time.

7. Believe in the unbelievable: Santa, The Easter Bunny, Unicorns and The Tooth Faerie.

8. Play more. Visit a farm. Go to the zoo. Talk to a squirrel. Write a story. Draw a picture. Make macaroni art.

9. Let your silly out. Spontaneously dance, sing, do a cartwheel or stuff marshmallows in your mouth.

10. Let your imagination run wild. Go on a safari with your pet flying monkey. Visit Mars in your spaceship. Swim in a sky of stars as a mermaid. Talk to the faeries in the chandelier.

11. Embrace wonder, joy, innocence and the monsters under the bed.

How to be positive.

1. Choose between being a collection of happy, shiny, rainbow-magic jellybean molecules of effervescent-infused joy or mud girl.

2. See beauty, fortune, wonder and magic everywhere. Look for it in nature's colours, scents and sounds, fluffy clouds, resilient trees, singing birds, random squirrels, quirky architecture, tossed-out treasures, people's faces, funky outfits, and anything else that strikes your fancy. Just take notice!

3. Count what you have, not what you don't have.

4. See the field, not the fence.

5. Life's a mystery, so assume that it's a box of kittens and not a box of scorpions.

6. Make it your regular practice. Aim to be friendly, nice, complimentary and joyful towards yourself, the snarky bus driver, the adorable, but stinky screaming baby on the bus, the oblivious too-cool-for-school backpack boy, the stream of slow walkers on the stairs, seat-hoggers on the subway, the 99 year old lady in line ordering coffee and trying to decide what donut she wants, your coworkers (especially the yucky ones), your boss, any irritating family members, friends and unfriendly random squirrels. Do it all day and see what happens. Betcha get it back!

7. Embrace the magic notion that what you think and do will result in how you will feel and what you will receive.

8. Don't compare yourself to anything or anyone. Your life is yours and it's what you make of it. If you want a better job, a bigger bank account or to be a supermodel or astronaut – then do it.

9. Nothing is perfect. Life is bumpy. Sometimes we don't win. Redefine the "ouchies" as life lessons. Look for the good in every situation and in every person – even if the only good that you can find is the lesson of patience.

10. Fake it until you make it. Act as if you already are Pollyanna on Prozac ... it's a habit in the making and it's very contagious.

11. Helpful quotes, affirmations, mottos and post-it notes: "Beauty is as beauty does." "Blessed are the cracked for they let in the most light." "Feck Perfuction." "This too shall pass." "Take things one day at a time." "You are more than enough."

How to have fun.

1. Let go of control, the shouldn'ts, the don'ts and the pressure of being a grown-up. Be sure to break the rules!

2. Be spontaneous! Jump in the sprinkler, make a snow angel or start a dance party on the street. Own your Silly Billy!

3. Dress the part! Pull out your tutu, faerie wings and sparkly sneakers.

4. Dare to do something different. Go to a rodeo, learn pole dancing, swim with the sharks or take up axe throwing.

5. Laugh – at comedians, movies, each other and especially yourself.

6. Throw a come-as-you-are potluck pyjama party.

7. Be the first to sing, dance and dress like a full on freak, because everyone is waiting for permission to do the same.

8. Explore nature. Watch bugs, climb a tree, go on a picnic, splash in the water, dig in the dirt, roll in the leaves and howl at the moon.

9. Play Bingo, Charades or Truth, Dare or Double Dare! Swing a bat, kick a ball and bluff your way through a hand of poker! Pull out Twister, your Hot Wheels set or play hide and go seek. Be a child again.

10. Do something that you love to do. Cook, garden, make music, art – even better, do it with fun people.

11. Play make believe and choose to see everything as an adventure.

How to manifest your dreams.

1. Believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that you can do it. You can!

2. Create a mantra and say it 100 times a day. For example, "I own a petting zoo." "I own a petting zoo." "I own a petting zoo."

3. Plant seeds the size of coconuts. Everywhere. Tend to them daily.

4. Reframe everything that you think and say as though it is happening in this moment. "I love playing with my pet monkey Mervin." "I love the rainbow monkey barn."

5. Commit to your dreams. Come up with a theme song, a daily ritual, post-it notes of affirmations and a treasure box to store all of your super cool ideas and clippings. Practice doing things you thought were impossible every day.

6. Have real conversations with your imaginary dream team (and animals).

7. Star in the block buster movie version of your life.

8. Tell everyone what you are going to do. Backer-outers suck.

9. When it feels really far away – look over the fence and into the field of daisies. See, it's not that far after all.

10. Draw a map. Establish signposts. Set milestones. Treat yourself to good hiking boots because you're going to go far!

11. Recruit believers.

Wholeness

How to be yourself.

1. Start with loving yourself from head-to-toe, inside out and upside down.

2. Don't second-guess it. Just be you.

3. Own your unique pizzazz. From freckles and Bozo the clown curls to wonky winks, wiggles and giggles – it's all YOU!

4. Love the skin that you're in. Love every inch, jiggle, wrinkle and curve.

5. Do what makes you happy. Talk to squirrels, wear your mermaid tail and love Taylor Swift!

6. Claim your fashion fame. Rock the fun-fur jumpsuit, sparkly cape and pink cowgirl go-go boots. Define your personal style!

7. Celebrate your own identity and celebrity status. There's no need to mimic, impersonate or copy anyone else. You rock.

8. Master your multiple personalities! Contemplate the notion that "the self" can evolve and change. Think about who you want to be.

9. Always choose quirky over perfection.

10. Don't give a poop about what other people think. You want to be liked for being the real you, not the people-pleasing pretend you.

11. Shine your light from the inside out.

How to be confident.

1. Fake it until you make it. Start small and reward yourself with gold stars.

2. How you think affects how you feel and in turn, will affect how you act.

3. Learn to rely on yourself. Remember when you fell down – you got up!

4. Affirmations and declarations equal liberation!

5. Accept that nothing is certain (except how you choose to handle a situation). Choose strength.

6. Practice and prepare. From body language to verbal language. Write conversations, speeches and soliloquies. Grab your hairbrush and stand in front of the mirror. Get friendly with your fear then stand up straight and make eye contact!

7. Who is the best you? You are. Know your strengths and weaknesses.

8. Claim your own style with confidence. Not everyone is a Johnny Depp or a Martha Stewart. Wear your super cape with pride.

9. Foster trademarks of confidence like spunk, pluck, moxie, humour, sarcasm, wit, stillness, silence, poise, boldness, backbone and grit.

10. Accept compliments. Stockpile praise. Expect success.

11. Never forget that you matter. A lot.

How to be grateful.

1. Count your blessings. It can always be worse.

2. Compare your first world problem to third world problems.

3. Do you have a roof over your head? Food in your fridge? Clothes on your back? Enough said.

4. So what if your job is stressful? It's not called work for nothing.

5. Embrace the habit of acknowledging your gratitude. Start a gratitude diary. List five things every day that you are grateful for. For example, my freckles, my pets, the sunshine, the delicious banana I had for breakfast and a blue sky.

6. Do good deeds and random acts of kindness. It's contagious and Karma will love you for it.

7. Be grateful out loud. Tell your friends and family how much they mean to you. Express gratitude to the stranger who gives you a seat on the bus.

Say thank you and mean it.

8. Get with the grateful mindset. Acknowledge and accept. See the silver lining – even challenges can be awesome life lessons.

9. Avoid negativity, giving in to jealousy and complaining. Choose positivity, contentment and grace.

10. Appreciate the moment. Life can change on a dime.

11. Savour the sweet spots. Share when your cup runneth over. Always give thanks.

How to be spirit full.

1. Be aware and thankful for the abundance in your life.

2. Your spirit is your natural essence – a combination of your emotions, character and soul. Your true self. Your most magical being. Be your best being.

3. Gawd Gawddess, Buddha, Allah, Ganesh; Judaism, Hinduism, Christianity, Taoism, Islam, Paganism; angels, faeries, bunny heaven, mermaids and unicorns. Call it what you will. If you believe, it's real.

4. You can call it religion, a higher power, spirituality, philosophy, agnosticism, pragmatism, universal love, magic or being a believer – if it works for you keep doing it.

5. Faith is personal. Believe in and trust what resonates with you and gives meaning to your life. It's all good.

6. Express your spirit with praise, thanks, good words, good wishes and good deeds.

7. Foster your spirit. Fill up on it. Let it light your heart and mind, then let it loose! Dance, sing, share and rejoice in whatever way works for you!

8. Celebrate your spirit! Go to festivals, feasts and bon fires. And definitely wear costumes!

9. Get naked! It's your best "super natural" being.

10. G.O.D. – Great. Out. Doors.

11. Breathe it. Believe it. Be it.

How to be vulnerable.

1. Being open to censure, criticism, hurt, harm and temptation also prepares you to be open to approval, applause, freedom, joy, adventure and love.

2. Accept that no one, including and especially you, is unbreakable and I don't recommend falling down the stairs to prove it.

3. Put aside your moxie-assed mule, super control freak, self-governing, independent attitude and admit that you could use a little itty bit of help ... just maybe.

4. Crack open the vault and reach down into the subterranean caverns of your defensive soul to pull out your bare naked, un-armoured, shelter less self. Easy peasy right?

5. Relinquish being Super Woman, Helen Keller, Joan of Arc or Maria from the Sound of Music.

6. Learn to ask for help. "You know that 100 lb pile of logs? Oh, did I mention that I'm baking brownies on Saturday?"

7. Shift your paradigm. Asking for help doesn't mean that you're helpless – it means you're human. In fact, if you ask that cute strong lumberjack to help you move the logs you might possibly kill two birds with one stone.

8. When you feel stupid, needy, weak or less awesome than usual, remember that these feelings are normal – everyone experiences those feelings at some point. Join the club!