The Hidden Rules of Attachment : What No One Tells You About Why You Love, Need, and Push People Away
Language: English
Published by Independently Published Sep 2026, 2026
- Softcover
- New
Seller: AHA-BUCH GmbH, Einbeck, GermanyAHA-BUCH GmbH
AbeBooks seller since August 14, 2006
Condition: New
£ 18.60
Quantity: 2 available
Add to basketItem description from seller
Neuware.
Seller Inventory # 9798176695656
- Title
- The Hidden Rules of Attachment : What No One Tells You About Why You Love, Need, and Push People Away
- Author
- Maya Elson
- Publisher
- Independently Published Sep 2026
- Publication year
- 2026
- Condition
- Neu
- Binding
- Taschenbuch
- Language
- English
- ISBN 13
- 9798176695656
- Item weight
- 143 grams
- Dimensions
- 216x140x6 mm
Why can a delayed message feel strangely significant? Why do some people need reassurance but feel ashamed for needing it? Why can someone who desperately wants love become the very person who pushes it away?
Most relationship patterns make sense once you understand what is happening underneath them.
THE HIDDEN RULES OF ATTACHMENT explores the quiet psychological rules that shape how people love, trust, need, withdraw, pursue, and protect themselves in relationships.
These rules are rarely spoken aloud.
They can sound like:
If they really love me, they should already know what I need.
If I depend on someone, I give them too much power.
If they need space, something must be wrong.
If I let someone get too close, I might lose myself.
If I am useful enough, they will have a reason to stay.
The problem is that many of these rules were formed long before we had the language to question them.
What once helped create a sense of safety can later shape adult relationships in ways that are difficult to recognize. A person may interpret uncertainty as rejection, independence as distance, vulnerability as danger, or reassurance as something that must be repeatedly earned.
And because these reactions feel personal, they are often mistaken for personality.
This book takes a different approach.
Rather than reducing people to attachment labels, it looks at the intelligence behind the patterns—and the hidden costs that can develop when those patterns continue long after the circumstances that created them have changed.
Inside, you will explore:
* Why connection matters so deeply to the human mind
* The four broad ways people learn to approach closeness
* Why the need to be needed can become a way of securing love
* What happens beneath pursuit, withdrawal, and emotional distance
* How familiar emotional reactions become deeply practiced patterns
* Why closeness can feel comforting and threatening at the same time
* The unspoken rules people carry about love, trust, reassurance, and vulnerability
* What actually helps relationships recover after conflict
* How to change relational patterns without abandoning your identity
* What makes a relationship feel dependable, reciprocal, and emotionally secure
This is not a book about becoming perfectly secure.
It is about becoming more aware of what happens inside you when connection becomes uncertain—and discovering that an old reaction does not have to become a permanent response.
You do not have to stop needing people.
You do not have to become completely independent.
You do not have to erase the parts of yourself that learned to protect you.
You simply need to understand the rules you have been living by.
Because once a hidden rule becomes visible, it can finally be questioned.
And once it can be questioned, something changes:
You have a choice.
If you have ever wondered why you repeat the same relationship patterns, why certain people affect you more deeply than others, or why understanding yourself intellectually does not always change what you do in the moment, THE HIDDEN RULES OF ATTACHMENT offers a clear, grounded way to understand what has been happening beneath the surface—and what becomes possible when you begin to see it clearly.
"Synopsis" may belong to another edition of this title.
Shipping rates from Germany to U.S.A.
| Item | 7 to 10 business days | 5 to 7 business days |
|---|---|---|
| First item | £ 29.74 | £ 38.24 |
Payment methods
- Bank Wire Transfer
- Check
- Paypal
Store description
Das Unternehmen AHA-BUCH GmbH: Seit der Gründung von AHA-BUCH im Juli 2005 ist unser Hauptziel, zufriedenen Kunden so schnell und so preisgünstig wie möglich ihren Bücherwunsch zu erfüllen. Unsere Firma beschäftigt 16 Mitarbeiter, die nur ein Ziel kennen: den Kunden und seine Wünsche! Auf über 3700 m2 Fläche haben wir über 100.000 Bücher, Modernes Antiquariat und Spiele auf Lager.
Specialty
Kinderbücher & Kinderhör Casetten, German Books, Software, Natur & Tiere, Ratgeber, Sachbücher, Englische Bücher, Medizin & Gesundheit, Universität & StudiumSeller's business information
AHA-BUCH GmbH
Garlebsen 48
Einbeck, Germany 37574
Terms of sale
Imprint
Seller Info:
AHA-BUCH GmbH
represented by the managing director Christel Glass
Garlebsen 48
37574 Einbeck
Deutschland
Telefon: 055639996039
Telefax: 055639995974
E-Mail: abebooks@aha-buch.de
USt-IdNr.: DE261904229
registered at Commercial register Amtsgerichtes Göttingen
Handelsregisternummer HRB 200691
Alternative dispute resolution:
The European Commission provides a platform for out-of-court online dispute resolution (ODR platform), which can be accessed under https://ec.europa.eu/odr.
We have been a member of the "FairCommerce" initiative since 25.05.2018.
For more information, see www.fair-commerce.de.
Right of withdrawal
If you are a consumer you can withdraw from the contract in accordance with the following. Consumer means any natural person who is acting for purposes which are outside his trade, business, craft or profession.
Information regarding the right of withdrawal
Statutory right to withdraw
You have the right to withdraw from this contract within 14 days without giving any reason.
The withdrawal period will expire after 14 days from the day on which you acquire, or a third party other than the carrier and indicated by you acquires, physical possession of the last good or the last lot or piece.
To exercise the right of withdrawal, electronically fill in and submit a clear statement on our website, under "My Purchases" in "My Account". We will communicate to you an acknowledgement of receipt of such a withdrawal on a durable medium (e.g. by e-mail) without delay.
To meet the withdrawal deadline, it is sufficient for you to send your communication concerning your exercise of the right of withdrawal before the withdrawal period has expired.
Effects of withdrawal
If you withdraw from this contract, we will reimburse to you all payments received from you, including the costs of delivery (except for the supplementary costs arising if you chose a type of delivery other than the least expensive type of standard delivery offered by us).
We may make a deduction from the reimbursement for loss in value of any goods supplied, if the loss is the result of unnecessary handling by you.
We will make the reimbursement without undue delay, and not later than 14 days after the day on which we are informed about your decision to withdraw from this contract.
We will make the reimbursement using the same means of payment as you used for the initial transaction, unless you have expressly agreed otherwise; in any event, you will not incur any fees as a result of such reimbursement.
We may withhold reimbursement until we have received the goods back, or you have supplied evidence of having sent back the goods, whichever is the earliest.
You shall send back the goods or hand them over to AHA-BUCH GmbH, Einbeck, Germany, without undue delay and in any event not later than 14 days from the day on which you communicate your withdrawal from this contract to us. The deadline is met if you send back the goods before the period of 14 days has expired. You will have to bear the direct cost of returning the goods. You are only liable for any diminished value of the goods resulting from the handling other than what is necessary to establish the nature, characteristics and functioning of the goods.
Exceptions to the right of withdrawal
The right of withdrawal does not apply to:
- The delivery of newspapers, journals or magazines with the exception of subscription contracts; and
- The supply of digital content which is not supplied on a tangible medium (e.g. on a CD or DVD) if you accepted when you placed your order that we could start to deliver it, and that you could not withdraw once delivery had started.
Shipping terms
We ship your order after we received them
for articles on hand latest 24 hours,
for articles with overnight supply latest 48 hours.
In case we need to order an article from our supplier our dispatch time depends on the reception date of the articles, but the articles will be shipped on the same day.
Our goal is to send the ordered articles in the fastest, but also most efficient and secure way to our customers.