Becky has brown eyes. Her reflection has blue. A voice from within her mind calls her “Janie”. Becky can feel her identity slipping away from her, hiding in the dark corners of her mind. Her journey on the dangerous road ahead forces her to question not only her sanity but even her desire for survival. Richard, a psychiatrist, must first confront the haunting shadows of his own past before he can reach into his patient’s fragile dark mind and rescue her from the demons driving her over the edge.
She stood nervously at the edge of the cliff, knowing that her new life was only one step away. She stood alone with her thoughts, the brightness of the warm sunny day a sharp contrast to the darkness that lay within her mind.
She carefully looked over the edge, her long red hair billowing out behind her, it was a long way to fall to the crashing deep-blue waters below and death beckoned her like an old welcoming friend. It called to her seductively, trying to tempt her; the desire to fall into peaceful oblivion wrapping around her and persuading her, whispering her name softly.
The deadly whispers from the deep blue waters below grew louder and louder, silencing the other sounds around her until she could no longer hear the laughter of the children from further back down the cliff, nor could she hear the screech of the seagulls soaring high above her. The only sound she could hear, which was loud enough to shatter the peace of the day, was the screaming in her head calling her to end her wretched life and finally be free from the darkness that surrounded and enveloped her.
As she listened to the seductive voice of death, another voice slowly began to penetrate the darkness like a tiny pinpoint of light, growing louder and louder and her mind gradually became brighter as the dark shrouds faded.
Janie? Janie! Who are you now, Janie? Do you know what you are running from? Where did you get all that money? Do you remember why you took it?
The questions filled her mind and as she struggled to find the answers, the dark voice of death finally subsided and the temptation to fall into peaceful oblivion passed.
You are not here to die, Janie. You are here to live again.
Now she remembered that the sea below her was not where her new life was to be; her future lay on a different path. She was only here at the edge of the cliff to make others believe that she had gone over and the small pile behind her would surely be convincing enough. She glanced around at the neatly folded clothes she had left the house in earlier, with her purse and gold locket gently resting on the top. She nodded to herself; that should be enough, and then she thought again of a note. Should she leave a note; wouldn’t that ensure that there was no room for any doubt?
Well it was time to go, her new life was waiting for her, full of mystery and the unknown like an undiscovered country lying out in front of her, waiting to be explored. Her only tools to accompany her in her new life were the newly purchased clothes that she was now wearing and a new sports bag stuffed full of money but devoid of any form of identity. She was a rich nobody starting out on a new life.
Three Years Later.
It was nearly time for Becky Armige’s life to end. She now knew that it was just a question of when, but it couldn’t be far away because she had just seen the first real physical signs. Of course there had been a lot of emotional warnings lately like the intensely different feelings that had been washing over her in strong unexpected waves, drowning her with the sinister knowledge that things were coming to an end.
Strong feelings such as the crushing boredom of her life at home as a "housewife", the desperation of loneliness she could feel suffocating her even when in the company of her boyfriend, and the feeling that her life should be so much more than this, all of these feelings should have prepared her for the fast-approaching end. But even so, the first physical sign still came as quite a shock. She had always known that Becky’s life, HER life was going to be a short one, but she had to admit feeling a little surprised at exactly how short.
Becky was staring hard at the mirror; she had been for some time. How long exactly, she didn’t know but she remembered coming into the bathroom. She had been washing her hands when she had glanced up in the mirror. That was when she had noticed the first sign.
At first, she had thought it was a trick of the light, but no matter how she moved her reflection stayed the same. That was when she had frozen, feeling a little nervous at what she had seen. In the mirror her reflection was looking back at her, with the clearest blue eyes.
Blue Janie. Do you like Blue?
A shade of blue so clear and so bright, as if painted delicately on the eyes of a child’s porcelain doll. They were such beautiful eyes. But they were not Becky’s eyes; Becky had always had dark brown eyes.
The changes have started Janie.
Then the tingling all over her body started, as if all her muscles were waking up after suffering severe cramp, every nerve and fibre pulsating with the feeling of coming alive, her body aching with the craving to experience life. The rush of adrenaline suddenly surging through her was so intense she almost felt giddy and drunk with it; it was a delicious sensation of power swelling through her, a feeling so satisfying she giggled aloud to her reflection.
"How can I feel this alive when I’m about to die? I feel incredible."
Becky smiled at herself in the mirror, taking a delightful pleasure in the way the light reflected and sparkled in her beautiful blue eyes; her NEW eyes. She was fascinated with the new beginning, but a part of her hungered for the end.
And so it was then that she knew that Becky Armige’s life would soon be over.
