Many life stories are represented in this book that is presented as a poetic autobiography. The author uses the poetic "voice" to announce that we are all "wonderfully made" despite being told or treated otherwise. Although there is anger, pain and protest on the pages, there is also love, pleasure and power included. The book is both cultural autobiography and poetry therapy. It is both sad and sassy. The goal is for the reader to leave the work with a new sense of priceless value. What is most interesting is that the author gets to your heart and brain with powerful poetry that can assist you with self expression and empowerment.

Contrary to Rumor, I'm Wonderfully Made!

Poetry as a Life PreserverBy Nanthalia W. McJamerson

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2011 Nanthalia W. McJamerson
All right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4567-5041-1

Contents

Foreword......................................................xiIntroduction..................................................xvPart I: Life in Question......................................1Worthy or Not?................................................2So, You Can't Miss What You've Never Had?.....................3FIRE!.........................................................4What of a Dream Denied?.......................................5Bewildered....................................................6Ladybug Monologue.............................................7Switching Intelligence?.......................................8Part II: Some Wonderful Parts of Life.........................9Until You.....................................................10Feeling.......................................................11Feelings......................................................12Thank You.....................................................13Daddy.........................................................13Innocent Love.................................................14Sobriety Test.................................................15Especially Mine...............................................16Relationships Worth the Trouble...............................17Savor the Flavor..............................................18Part III: Where Did the Wonderful Go?.........................19Fighting God on Sunday........................................20I Wish I Had Not Believed.....................................22I'm Not In....................................................23Wonderfully Made, but ........................................24Spelling Lesson about a Noose.................................30You Pack It, You Pay..........................................32Part IV: Encouragement........................................35Friends Are God's Assistants..................................36For the Flight................................................38How'd Ya Do It?...............................................39Experiencing Diversity........................................40Love Letters..................................................41Prayer of Alianndra...........................................42Pillow........................................................43Part V: More Wonderful Parts of Living........................45A Visionary's Eyes............................................46A Tale of Two Epiphanies......................................47An Achievement Rap for Children...............................48I Don't Want to Love You Crazy Kids!..........................49Part VI: Empowerment and Eternity.............................51Your Wings....................................................52My Big God....................................................53Contrary to Rumor, I Am Wonderfully Made......................54Image Search..................................................55"Everything's Pretty".........................................56In Heaven, Part Time..........................................57Thank You for Loving Mary Scott Hobdy.........................58He Loves Me...................................................59A Success Builder's Promise...................................60Take Yourself to the Appraisers...............................61Reader's Reflection & Response Journal........................63

Chapter One

        Worthy or Not?


    Why am I not worthy
    And not considered strong?
    Why am I not living free?
    I did nothing wrong.

    Why did you take my glory?
    What made you destroy my glee?
    How did you steal the power
    That was meant solely for me?

    You say I'm the assailant,
    The weak one or the dunce.
    Nonsense! Check your asinine record
    And set it straight, just once.

    Someday, an answer will come;
    Someday, this pain will end;
    Or I could get some relief, now,
    With a weapon, song or pen.

    I have chosen a pen
    To set the record straight, today:
    "I've discovered that I am amazing
    And you can never, again, take my worth away."


        So, You Can't Miss
        What You've Never Had?

    If you can't miss what you've never had,
    Then why am I yearning so?
    If you can't miss places never trod,
    Then why do I wish to go?

    If you can't miss methods never tried,
    Then why acquire a new skill?
    If you can't miss relationships unborn,
    Why is bonding the core of my will?


        FIRE!
        (Daddy's wisdom)

    What do you do
    When you're close to fire?
    Burn or Blossom?
    Crack or Crystallize?
    Evaporate? Expand?
    Explode? Expire?
    Faint? Fortify? Frazzle?
    Melt or Materialize?
    Whither or Withstand?
    Scorch or Sparkle?
    Recoil or Rise?

    The answer depends upon
    What you're made of
    And the quality of the fire.


        What of a Dream Denied?

    Langston Hughes spoke of a dream deferred;
    What of a dream denied?

    Deferred, it has hope for a future;
    Denied, before birth, it died.

    Deferred, it's a note that anticipates sound;
    Denied it's a song with the pitch never found.

    Deferred, it is struggling but assured of what's hidden;
    Denied, may touch life but possession forbidden.


        Bewildered
        (a response to underestimation)

    What? A guitar?
    You thought I said I was a guitar?
    A guitar is only one component
    of the "me" ensemble.
    Weren't you listening?
    Were you looking?
    "This is an ensemble," I said.

    An ensemble is all I thought I was at that time.
    I have since discovered, however,
    That even then I was more than an ensemble
    (but you swore I said I was only a guitar!)
    My God! I am bewildered!!!
    This is incredulous: a guitar.
    I'm still reeling from the accusation.

    Just when my balance nearly returned
    You add the consensus of the moon.
    You've now put me in
    A whole new whirl!!!

    By the way,
    I am an orchestra!
    And if I ever get my balance back
    I might not tell you what I am,
    But rather, I will show you
    How to say goodbye.

Ladybug Monologue

There is no question about it:
I am delighted to be a ladybug.
"Humanhood" is just too hard.
My identity as a ladybug is uncomplicated,
A background of radiant color
With ebony dots sprinkled atop.
But as for humans,
Their identity is so complex:
Different skin tones,
Different hair textures,
Different languages
(Even when humans speak
the same language they
seldom understand each other),
Different concepts of bounty,
Different symbols of beauty,
Different economies, different equalities.
Different beliefs and values
(often within identical environments),
Different religions, rules and rituals,
Different anvils, different aspirations.
What a mess! What a mess!

It is no wonder they stay confused.
It is no wonder they remain in conflict.
Poor pitiful little humans—
Will they ever be okay?
Will they ever find their way?

        Switching Intelligence?
        (or Mutable Value)
        Inspired by 2005 LEC 704 Class
        Reflections on Jane Elliot's Work

    I am smart today.
    How do I know?
    My school teacher told me so.

    I'll be dumb tomorrow.
    How can that be?
    My school teacher will label me.

    Treated valuable today
    And worthless tomorrow
    Means one day happiness, the next day sorrow.

    And, oh yes,
    by the way,
    My behavior will match my status today.

    I know what would be
    Better still:
    Having my teacher's intelligence subjected to my will.

    If I could determine
    Who would be labeled as "smart"
    Then every child would have a better start.

Chapter Two

Some Wonderful Parts of Life (This section is dedicated to my husband, Dr. Jimmy McJamerson)

        Until You

    I beheld Love's symbols
    and knew of their infinity,
    but I'd never felt
    Love's powerful divinity,
    until you.

    Though lured and exhausted
    by life's pleasure,
    I had never accepted
    joy's greater treasure.

    Though pierced and carved
    by the sword of demanding,
    I was not refined
    into understanding.

    Like a champion
    I mastered chronic affliction;
    Never was I a slave to any addiction,
    until you.

    I had independence
    in abundant supply
    but no freedom, no wings
    for me to fly,
    until you.


        Feeling

    I feel you on my heart
    But more importantly,
    Inside my heart.
    I feel you on and with
    My breasts,
    But more importantly
    Inside my breasts.
    I feel you with
    And through my hands
    But more importantly,
    Inside my hands.

    I feel you with, through
    Around, beside my body
    But more importantly
    Inside my body!
    I felt you approach
    And engulf my soul,
    But more importantly
    You stepped inside
    And when the feeling
    Resides inside
    Then I know it is
    Love that I feel.

Feelings

Looking into your eyes
Is a very selfish act,
For it leaves imprints inside me—
A sensuous, l-i-n-g-e-r-i-n-g impact.


Thank You

A cradle and a jungle
Occupy the same terrain;
It was here that you nurtured me
And here you drove me insane.

        Daddy


    We could not contain him
    So we had no choice but to share him with others.
    He had so much love within his heart
    That it spilled beyond the boundaries of bloodline:
    He was a father
    To so many more than his children;
    He was a neighbor
    To so many more than local citizens;
    He was a kinsman
    To so many more than his race.
    Even non-human creatures buzzed
    And wagged around him,
    For their antenna sensed his soothing care.
    Even Mother Nature had a partnership
    And friendship with the man,
    At planting and harvest time.

    Daddy uttered wisdom through conversation
    But his love was expressed through perspiration—
    Hard labor, love labor,
    Towering presence, tender tears, steel nerves.
    God did not lose in releasing John Henry Washington to us;
    We did not lose in returning him to God.


        Innocent Love

    My Dear Love,
    I don't have much to say
    Except I think of you
    23 hours a day.

    Most people might think
    That is hard to do,
    But it's easy for me
    Because I love you.

    There really is not
    Very much to be said
    As it is getting late
    And I must go to bed.

    Before closing my eyes to sleep
    I'll get down on my knees
    And say a very short prayer
    That includes words like these:

    "Dear Heavenly Father,
    You are busy, I know,
    But I love this man
    And I miss him so.

    Therefore, I must ask
    Just one thing from above,
    That you will please,
    Please bless our love."

Sobriety Test

I'm going to be arrested
for D. W. I.
because my judgment is impaired,
And this is the reason why:
I'm thinking of you.

        Especially Mine
        (For my deserving friends)

    I want something from above,
    Not universal love.
    I want a love that is especially mine.
    Having nothing awesome to say,
    On an ordinary day
    Will be perfect as long as it is divine.
    I want a hand to hold,
    Not just silver and gold.
    I want the river that will run really deep.
    I want more than a ring;
    I want a song to sing;
    I want a promise that is easy to keep.

    The search is trying;
    It leaves me crying,
    Sometimes leaving me flat on my face.
    But I will not give up;
    God will fill my cup.
    I'll hold onto His amazing grace.
    I've tried to do my part;
    I've touched a many heart;
    It could be I have given too much.
    Forgive me if that's so,
    And please don't let me go.
    Renew my soul with Thy special touch.

    I'm learning to wait on You
    In everything I do;
    I've learned to say, "Not my will, but Thine."
    I know you'll let me see
    More than I dreamed could be:
    You'll send a love that is especially mine.

Relationships Worth
the Trouble
(Based on Elmira McCarty's
definition of marriage)

Attraction
Interaction
Action
Reaction
Transaction
Fraction
Faction
Traction
Contraction
Distraction
Detraction
Infraction
Retraction
Exaction
Extraction
Protraction
Benefaction
Compaction
Satisfaction

        Savor the Flavor


    The most complete love is like a meal,
    You not only taste, but also you feel.
    First, because a great chef treasures
    All ingredient he or she measures,
    Then balances and seasons a special way—
    From soup and salad to entrée—
    So that you can savor
    The flavor.

    The menu of love will include
    All of the following food:
    The strengthening bread of personality,
    The sweet nectar of sensual ecstasy,
    Affection in proportionate fills
    Served up à la mental thrills.
    If depth of love is to be preserved,
    Then morsels from the soul must be served.

    From the table we cannot depart
    Without outpourings from the heart,
    You shouldn't consume the meal too fast—
    Partake of all and make it last
    Savor the flavor.

    We sustain each other as we dine;
    It was so ordained in a plan divine,
    So, savor
    The flavor.

(Continues...)

Excerpted from Contrary to Rumor, I'm Wonderfully Made!by Nanthalia W. McJamerson Copyright © 2011 by Nanthalia W. McJamerson. Excerpted by permission of AuthorHouse. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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