Andagift
Poems of inspiration, humour and natureBy Mary Jane C. HilliUniverse, Inc.
Copyright © 2010 Mary Jane C. Hill
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4502-6797-7Chapter One
"Andagift"
Icelandic for inspiration
Scottish, Irish, German, Welsh
Creative, dramatic, romantic hope
Not Icelandic, but a lover of words
Not always happy, but a lover of Earth
Living, loving, wanting, sharing
Humour, beauty, and inspiring life
Andagift: for you, for me
Cycles
Vernal means spring
The newness of the living
Summer is the fullness
Of harvest rebirth
Autumn is on fire
As the leaves change and die
Winter is the end
Of an old one's life
Spring will come again
With hope on the mend
SPRING LIFE
Wishing
Fairies dance in a circle light
Round and round when the moon is bright
Look for them in the crimson night
Wish on them in the golden light
Gossamer Wings
Fairies glide on gossamer wings
Dewdrops kiss their fingertips
Lightly o'er the primrose go
Skipping brightly o'er the meadow
Silhouette
Feathered tendrils of equal length
Reach out and sway mysteriously
Thinner reaching from a thicker stalk
Branches from a tree trunk walk
Life like a Tree
Doesn't life seem like a tree?
Do we spread out endlessly?
Can we have a firm foundation?
And reach out with a thousand hands?
After Two Weeks
Take a breath
Think of why
The sun shines
The pelicans fly
Live the warmth
Sun shines down
Warm white sand
Skin turning brown
Hear the white
Crashing waves
From the sea
In blue—three shades
Taste the food
By the pool
Yummy snacks
And drinks way cool
Close your eyes
See the dream
Open up to
Palm trees in green
Feel the peace
Time well spent
Chair or chaise
How quickly it went
Your Birthday
It's your birthday
What will you do?
Fly to Cancun
Or go to the zoo
Go to bed early
Or sleep in late
Drink cream and coffee
Or go on a date
Get cards and emails
Real flowers, not fake
Eat a burrito
Ice cream and cake
It's my birthday
What will I do?
All of those things
I just told you!
Words
How can you know what I know?
How can you see what I see?
Letters on a page, letters on a page.
How can you feel what I feel?
How can you love what I love?
Feelings in me, feelings in me.
How can you learn what I learn?
How can you yearn for what I yearn?
Words in a book, words in a book.
SUMMER SUN
Jet Lag
We flew to Toronto at 2:25 last night
Twenty-four hours later, I still don't feel right
In Mexico we left at 8:00, which really is like ten
But then we didn't get home until 6:00 am!
I woke up late and went outside and thought I'd feel more tired
But instead I am up late, and my thoughts are all wired
So now I've written several poems; my brain is all a flutter
I just got up and had a snack of apples and peanut butter
Better now than later so I don't ever forget
All the precious thoughts and words in my head still ticking yet!
I think I'm tired now—I'll hit the hay at last
So that the silly sandman his dreams on me can cast
So I say, "Good night to you, to all you who are listening."
Please shut off my brain so I can stop thinking!
Sitting on a Deck
Solitary, sedentary life is just right
To sort out the funny meaning of strife
What do you mean, you want to go home?
Big bucks were spent on the airplane flown!
We have it all here, our days in the sun
You better believe—you better have fun!
What I want is so different than this
Just what that is, is my secret wish.
Sticky, humid, but a chill in the air
Everything's wet, and there are knots in my hair!
Food and rest are the goal, but I've cramps in my style
A headache's the worst for going mile after mile
So hot, so muggy, my glasses are steamed
So is my brain from this life—so it seems
Smell, Taste and Feel
Slight salty smell permeates the air
Strong breeze blows about my hair
Moisture seeps into my skin
Reminds me of a place I've been
Tiny seashells dot the sand
Warm water on my feet where I stand
Coral sands tickle my soles
Where sand crabs make tiny air holes
Stripes of the Sea
Light clouds against the pale, blue sky
Steel sea distinctly creeps
Indigo blue calm, but deep
Aqua shallows stretch far from the eye
White waves dancing on coral sands
No birds, but one flies above
Moist air with a healthy breeze
Gently blows the feathered palm leaves
A full moon shines in the afternoon
Still lights line the ocean soon
Visiting India
Dry wind breathing through the trees
Curious spices permeating the breeze
Colourful saris swaying through the streets
Foods of various hues making flavourful treats
Steps to the water, men in white
Steps to the gods, candles burning bright
Weary widows wailing by the walls
Vendors selling anything in their stalls
Cows and carts and people milling by
Poverty and sickness, but many cheerful cries
Shopping—It's Intriguing
Memories of solitude
I want this, I need that
I've been there, remember that
Painting of a windmill
Angels of beeswax
Stories of anyone, anywhere
People and ideas
Leaving grief and mess behind
It's not so much for me as you
Or you, or you and you—it's true!
Creature of Habit
In high school my breakfast was Snickers bars and Tab,
Until rats were affected by the sweeteners in the lab!
Tea was the best until I was 43,
Now I'll only drink coffee, so just let me be!
For three to six months I went off most normal foods.
This was necessary to help my energy and moods.
I ate chicken and brown rice almost every day.
Organic granola and rice milk were the only way.
The only other foods were salads and strawberries.
I lost weight, to be sure, and was much more merry!
Slowly I added back all the wrong items—
Chocolate and ice cream are where most problems lie.
Salt on the chicken and salt on the rice;
Salt in the buttered waffles makes them taste just right.
Even the peanut butter has salt in the ice cream Blizzards.
I should watch what I eat because it will affect my gizzards!
Broccoli and lettuce, lentils and quinoa.
Burritos, artichokes, apples and cauliflower.
Now I should be eating food that's more healthy—
Eating foods that are mostly bland and sugar-free.
Pregnancy
Throw up
Lie down
Look at the birds
Throw up
Lie down
This is absurd
Throw up
Lie down
That's all I could do
Throw up
Lie down
Three months made me blue
Throw up
Lie down
No more TV
Throw up
Lie down
Commercials made me heave
Throw up
Lie down
No more work
Throw up
Lie down
Or nausea would lurk
Throw up
Lie down
Go to the doctors
Throw up
Drive on
Pull over
Throw up
Lie down
300 times
Throw up lie down for three babies mine
FALL FEELINGS
Autumn
Today is to be shared
Leaves are changing to fiery reds and yellows
Birds sing as if there was no evil
They call their loved ones from afar
A kind breeze begs branches dance
Lightly step the leaves on air
Crickets crick, cicadas trill
Today is one of newfound thrill
Night
There is a place where I go;
It's usually the same, you know.
It's safe, familiar and fun
Whether I fly, swim or run.
There are people I know
Whether my friend or my foe.
It helps me feel just right
Whether I love or I fight.
All day I'm secure
When I've been through that door.
Where I go every night
When my eyes are closed tight.
Dreams—Nighttime Realities
Hang on, Mom, please don't disappear
If you do, I'll faint, I fear
Often sisters in our home
Back when we were in our rooms
Blue house, kitchen floor
So many scenes through those doors
Teeth and gum, can't get it out
It must mean I want to shout!
Flying or toilets, most of the time
Too many roads, one more hill to climb!
Got to get home, got to get away
Sometimes my legs are lead, and my feet are clay
Dreams Keep Me Company
Scary, sad or even weird, they're
Better than reality
Go anywhere, meet anyone
After one night they're all done
Go home, see Mom
She has always been so calm
Fly high, trudge low
Through the trees, above the snow
Watch out for hydro lines
And get above the cool pines
Can't find my home, even though
I know the way to roam
Driving down the highway
The cars are not going my way!
Pull off really slow
Don't go against the flow
Take care, don't despair
I'll be there—I am prepared
Night dreams keep me company
Day dreams keep me sane
Another Dream
I'm in French class as a student
I'm in grade seven, promoted to eight
But I don't quite know it yet
I enjoy it, being with the class
Energy and charisma without the sass!
Later I'm selling a few loaves of bread
Out of a bunker where I should be dead
(That's a story for another poem)
I survived, climbed out, then in again
To cash out the line, wanting to win!
I'm late for class—it's one o'clock
I'm late for high school where I'm afraid to be mocked
I think it's a class on women's chauvinism
There are girls, women and a couple of men!
The speaker speaks up, I try to take notes
Stand up, sit down; is this a joke?
She tells us to wear our shirt like a model
Pull down the shoulder, lift up the bottom
We were to lift up and expose one breast
The men were the judges, and I won the contest!
Regrets—Only a Few
If I died tomorrow, I'd have few regrets:
I've had a great life from infancy on:
My mom read me stories; my dad sang me songs
My mom made Waldorf salad and roast beef galore
She also made Jell-O and cookies by the score
I swam with my dad and caught crabs by the sea
I sat on his lap and got tickled while we watched
him on TV
I had great aunts and uncles who let me visit them a lot
I had a lot of bread and butter and artichokes from a pot!
My cousins were my best friends—Richard, Sherry and Anne
Whether at their homes, the lake or the shore, playing was the
plan
I loved to swim, I loved to dive, and in the water I felt so alive
In gymnastics and skating I also felt the drive
I did fine in school, read lots of books and was never deprived
But it was playing sports and being in musicals on which I
really thrived
Through elementary and high school, many friends were made
Some of them I've kept in touch with to this day
I went to parties and danced with lots of boys
I never smoked and barely drank and usually kept my poise
In college I worked very hard, except when dating two men
The first one I never fought, the second one I married
I've taught in school now for 20-some years
It's been the best, most awesome career!
Hey, lucky me, I also had three boys
Who loved to play and always had books and lots of toys
Some men I've met make my few regrets—for treatment to or
from them
For knowing them is the hardest part, and from which most
heartaches stem!
My Eulogy
Don't be sad when I am gone
I have lived, and my journey's done
Eating cheese and drinking milk from a bowl
Being tickled when the old lady swallowed it whole
Swimming in our great, big pool
Diving like a dolphin felt so cool
Wading through our trickling stream
Playing or thinking alone was a dream
I had lots of friends and boyfriends too
Only two to which I said, "I love you"
I went on to act and to sing on stage
For many years, at any age
Teaching for so many years
Gave me joy and heartache and tears
Best of all is this family of mine
My husband and my three boys really make me shine!
WINTER STRUGGLES
Against the Current
Water rushes over me
Going against the current
I gain an inch, I lose a yard
My energy is almost spent
I could let go and then be free
I wish it wouldn't be so hard
I grab a rock, I gasp for air
Water running through my hair
Sliding off, but I swim strong
It's been going on so long
Help me breathe, help me reach
Help me reach the other side
Otherwise I'll lie on the beach
Washed ashore by the rising tide
Everything Has a Price
Everything has a price
How much must I sacrifice?
What can be done?
Without repercussion?
I know what should be done
But my heart still weighs a ton!
So tired, so sad, so weary
I don't
want to see things clearly
Self-pity only makes me cry
Weeping for the days gone by
Fine one day but gone the next
Weighs on my heavy-hearted chest
I know He's there, I never doubt
Why does my brain wrestle about?
I'm so torn, I'm so tired
Why is my conscience so hardwired?
I don't want to fight anymore
Just leave my tears here on the floor
Too Tired
Chorus:
Too tired to breathe
Too tired to care
Too tired to learn
Too tired to dare
Dare hope for life
Dare hope for love
Dare hope for death
Too tired to think
Too tired to sleep
Too tired to fight
Too tired to weep
Chorus
Dare to be free
Dare to be strong
Dare to be me
Chorus
Dare give up all
All that I have
Have what I got
Got what I want
Chorus
All except love
All except life
All except joy
That's what I want
The Pain
The pain, the pain, the pain
My leg, my side, my heart, my brain
The hurt, the hurt, the hurt
Strife and love—what's it all worth?
Crying
Thank you for your subtle hints
I'm trying to get the picture
Of where life is taking me
I really do try hard
To be the best I can
I read and give and want to love
It's hard to understand
Why life is so hard
Living with this man
Thank you for your subtle friends
I appreciate them all
Everywhere I see them
I try to share with others
And help them understand
Your subtle messages make us all better in the end
I'm grasping, I'm crying
In the shelter of my room
Trying to live with the gloom
I'm happy so often for children
Happy as can be
I'm happy when reading or watching TV
Just dealing with one of them
Stronger than me
Makes my heart sink
What'll it be?
Don't Know What I Want
I feel so deeply
So high and so low
Don't know what I want
Don't know what I know
I feel so alone
But know God's up above
Don't know what I want
Don't know what I love
There's passion within me
To live and to love
To sing and to dance free
To feel joy and romance
I know it's all out there
Don't know why it's not here
Pretty Colours
Small and coral pink
Just in case, I think
Oval, terra-cotta
Helps the epiglottis
Round and ruby red
Keeps the blood thickly spread
Long, oval, ruby rust
Keeps the moods in check, I trust
Small and white don't take at night
Keeps the energy just right
Take one now, take two later
Don't forget the refrigerator
This one with food, that one not
On an empty stomach—I almost forgot
(Continues...)
Excerpted from Andagiftby Mary Jane C. Hill Copyright © 2010 by Mary Jane C. Hill. Excerpted by permission of iUniverse, Inc.. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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