Blackmoney: The Inheritance Fund PART 5 (The Blackmoney Trilogy) - Softcover

Martens, Dimitry

Softcover

ISBN 13: 9798291943014

Publisher: Independently published, 2025

Synopsis

BLACKMONEY: THE INHERITANCE FUND (PART 5)
"Because sometimes, the only return on investment… is death."

Welcome back. Or… welcome for the first time. Doesn’t matter. If you’re holding this book, you’ve either:
Survived four previous BLACKMONEY brain traumas,
Clicked "Buy Now" while trying to download antivirus software,
Or you just really hate your family.

This isn’t just Part 5 — this is a psychological excavation. A literary crime scene. A funeral brochure soaked in sarcasm and sealed with a will no one understands.

Here’s what’s buried inside this grave of logic and decency:

A grave full of untaxed cash
A spider that may be God. Or a tax inspector. Or both.
A crucifix with no capital gains exemption
A grandmother in pearls who negotiates with Satan
A shovel. Because murder is cheaper than probate.

Yes, it’s about inheritance. But not the kind you’d expect. This is a financial horror-comedy where dying is easy, but collecting is a bureaucratic warzone.

You’ll find:
– Passive-aggressive Jesus on page 37
– A chapter that screams legal terms at a tombstone
– A toddler accidentally appointed executor of a 14-million-euro estate
– And a coffin that doubles as a safe deposit box

WARNING!
Reading this book may cause:
– Sudden urges to dig in your garden (don’t)
– Interest in inheritance law (help is available)
– Nightmares about elderly women with very sharp knitting needles
– Existential spirals tied to wills, worms, and weddings

AUTHOR'S PERSONAL NOTE
This book was written during a period of legal confusion, family betrayal, and mild indigestion. Since publishing, I’ve been removed from the family WhatsApp group, banned from three funerals, and legally disowned by my uncle's dog.
I regret nothing. Except maybe the Latin quote on page 12. No one understands Latin. Not even Latin.

They say, “Money is the root of all evil.”
I say: “That depends on who's holding the shovel.”

EARLY REVIEWS
"It’s like if a funeral, a hedge fund, and a nervous breakdown had a baby." – Billionaire (anonymous, for obvious reasons)
"Why is there a spider?" – Literally Everyone
"This book made me question my will. And my life choices." – Confused Reader
"The mother-in-law on the cover looked exactly like mine. She’s now suspicious." – Terrified Son-in-Law

PERFECT FOR READERS WHO:
Googled “how to inherit fast without getting caught”
think death is funny, if it's profitable
Enjoyed Parts 1–4 and want to be emotionally wrecked again
Have ever looked at a rich old relative and whispered, “Soon.”
Believe graves are for gold, not grief
Understand that funerals and finance go hand-in-hand

BOTTOM LINE?
This isn’t just a book.
It’s a dark comedy financial thriller disguised as literature.
It’s satire dipped in diesel and lit with inheritance paperwork.
It’s what happens when grief, greed, and god complexes collide in a courtroom with broken heating.

BLACKMONEY: THE INHERITANCE FUND (PART 5)
You’ll laugh. You’ll cry. You’ll check your grandma’s bank account.
But mostly… you’ll regret nothing.

Read it before the will is read.
Or during. We’re not responsible.

Edition details

• Publisher: Independently published
• Publication date: 2025
• Language: English
• ISBN 13: 9798291943014
• Binding: Paperback
• Number of pages: 30