How to be an Alien in England : A Guide to the English - Softcover

Angela Kiss

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1910463213 ISBN 13: 9781910463215

Publisher: September, 2016

Synopsis

A wry, often affectionate view on the English, and how to navigate our national personality

Ten years ago, Angela Kiss arrived in the UK without a word of English. All she brought with her was a small bag, a sense of adventure, a desire to work and a copy of George Mikes' classic 1940s' humour book about the peculiarities of the British, How to be an Alien.

Through every dodgy flat share, low-paid waitressing job, awkward date and office mishap, Angela held tight to George's wit and wisdom. With his help she began to understand how to live amongst the English - with their eccentricity, spirit and singing train drivers - and fell in love with a land rich in green spaces, pubs and puddings.

About this title

About the Author

Angela Kiss was born in Hungary, she has lived and worked in London for ten years. She has had three books published in Hungary, one of which was her memoir, One Way Ticket to London, which has been translated in English and self-published as an ebook. How to be an Alien in England is a wry, often affectionate view on the English, and how to navigate their national personality.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

‘The English do not like to be wished “Have a nice day”,because to them it sounds like a command. They think,Who the hell do you think you are to order me to have anice day?’‘One of my English friends said that the AmericanRevolution was so typical of the bloody Americans.When I asked how it could be typical if it was the firstand last and only War of American independence helooked at me as puzzled as if I were an alien from afaraway unknown planet.’‘English people are master of avoiding eye contact asmuch as avoiding explicit talks.’‘All job seeker aliens must know that the English peopleuse understatement all the time except in their CVwhich is total overstatement.’‘Shorter holidays in England always have unexpectedsurprises. You have a certain plan but transportcompanies have other plans.’‘The English don’t have worry genes in their DNA at all.Instead, they have the Keep Calm gene.’‘On my first week in England a homeless beggar askedme if I was alright. (I wasn’t alright at all. I didn’t speakEnglish, I didn’t have a job and I wasn’t even sure whatI was doing in England.) The last time I exchangedwords with a homeless person was back in Hungary, hesaid to me: ‘Hey honey, can I have a shag instead ofyour money?’‘Never contradict The English during weather talk. Ifthey say that 15 degrees is “quite unbearably hot” theneither you just say “indeed, it is quite unbearably hot” oryou shut up and nod.’‘If your English colleague never flirts with you, there is abig possibility that he or she is in love with you secretly.’

Edition details

• Publisher: September
• Publication date: 2016
• Language: English
• ISBN 10: 1910463213
• ISBN 13: 9781910463215
• Binding: Paperback
• Number of pages: 208