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The God of How: Understanding How Trials, Transitions, and Triumphs Fit into God's Plan for Your Life - Softcover

Williams, Preston

 
9781491711200: The God of How: Understanding How Trials, Transitions, and Triumphs Fit into God's Plan for Your Life
Softcover
ISBN 10: 1491711205 ISBN 13: 9781491711200
Publisher: iUniverse, 2013

Synopsis

When you are at the end of your proverbial rope, your mind and heart may be filled with questions about how such difficulties fit in with God's plan for your life. It is during those times that you need straight talk and forward-thinking principles. In The God of How: Understanding How Trials, Transitions, and Triumphs Fit into God's Plan for Your Life, Dr. Preston Williams II seeks to help you understand God's involvement in life's many transitions. Through true-life stories and biblical references, you can come to understand the key points of change, including submitting to God's process, examining your options, acknowledging your resources and support systems, and maintaining confidence in yourself and in God's track record for success. As you make your way through the personal stories and spiritual reflections included in this study, you can begin to see life situations from a purposeful vantage point. Be inspired to follow your dreams by seeing the world through God's eyes and prepared to confront the rapid and complex life challenges and transformation in the twenty-first century.

"synopsis" may belong to another edition of this title.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

The God of How

Understanding How Trials, Transitions, And Triumphs Fit into God's Plan For Your Life

By Preston Williams II

iUniverse LLC

Copyright © 2013 Dr. Preston Williams II
All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4917-1120-0

Contents

Dedication.................................................................vii
Foreword...................................................................xi
Preface....................................................................xv
Acknowledgments............................................................xix
Prologue...................................................................xxi
Part 1 Understanding Life's Trials.........................................1
Chapter 1 The Turning Point (Story)........................................3
Chapter 2 God WILL Give You More Than You Can Handle.......................10
Chapter 3 Visiting the Past—But Not For Too Long (Story)...................22
Chapter 4 Driven by Pressure or God's Pleasure.............................30
Chapter 5 The Image Sabbatical: Taking a Break from Who You Think You Are 
(Story)....................................................................		39
Part 2 Understanding Life's Transitions....................................45
Chapter 6 Dying To Be Me...................................................47
Chapter 7 In The Toils of Change (Story)...................................56
Chapter 8 Learn From Your Past but Live For Now: Life Change...............63
Chapter 9 And Still I Rise (Story).........................................73
Chapter 10 Preparing For Your Prophetic New................................81
Chapter 11 The Way We Were: The Homecoming (Story).........................95
Chapter 12 Confronting the Pros and Cons of Familiarity....................105
Part 3 Understanding Life's Triumphs.......................................119
Chapter 13 Once More To Live (Story).......................................121
Chapter 14 Behind the Curtain of Cause (A Tapestry of Experiences).........132
Chapter 15 Once More To Love (Story).......................................144
Chapter 16 Life Full Circle................................................158
Chapter 17 Triumphs: God's Ultimate Purpose Behind Trials and Transitions..171
Epilogue In Retrospect—This Book (My Testimony)............................181
Bonus Chapter..............................................................187
About the Author...........................................................199
Endnotes...................................................................201
Bibliography...............................................................205
Index......................................................................209


CHAPTER 1

The Turning Point (Story)


Savannah, Georgia—June 1991

He'd just flown in from presenting a week long seminar in St.Thomas, Virgin Islands. Enroute home from the airport, he turnsonto Bay Street from I-516. Driving through the historic district ofdowntown Savannah, he basked in the ease of living in this place ofwarm coastal breeze and meandering brick and cobblestone streets.And for the brief drive home, he chooses not to remember thetension between him and his wife before leaving for the seminar.

The man's name was William Clive Jamison II. Dusk wasfalling as he arrived in the driveway of his home. He immediatelyobserved the signs of his worse fears. Something truly unspeakablehad happened. The house was dark, and the daily newspapers hadbeen collecting on the front lawn for several days. As he turns hiskey to open the front door, there is a knot in the pit of his stomach.There was no response to his greeting—hello, as it echoed throughthe naked entrance way; offering the first answers to some of theimpending questions.

Little by little, from light switch to doorway, from room toroom, his fears were becoming a reality. William collapsed to hisknees in the middle of the living room, emotionally paralyzed by theshock of returning home to find it empty and filled with a disturbingsilence. The common voices of his wife and children mute from theabsence of their presence. Just a week earlier, he was sitting in thatvery living room with his thirteen-year-old son and eleven-year-olddaughter at his feet watching their favorite sitcom, his wife, scurryingaround the kitchen preparing dinner while making periodic remarksin response to the sitcom's dramatic moments. At that very momenthis life was—perfect.

This would be the last perfect evening he would have withhis family before leaving for St. Thomas the next morning. Itwould be the last evening he would spend with them as a family.One week later, after a remarkable week of lecturing, he returnedhome only to find his life dismantled and in utter disarray. He hadalways championed the cause of individuals experiencing personalabundance through the Spirit-filled life and striving to evolve tothe next higher level of fulfillment in the areas of life, love andrelationships. Indeed in the eyes of many he was the example of aloving husband and father, a dreamer, and a man living life fully ina successful ministry unfolding with each passing year. Yet, in onebrief week, with one major decision (unknown to him), this manwho was one of the most progressive voices in the arena of personaland spiritual empowerment—a champion of sorts, had been reducedto a victim.

He was a young up and coming leader. He was well known forhis effervescent personality, and he was distinguished as a publicspeaker. Now kneeling on his empty living room floor with histravel-bag dropped and leaning against his laptop briefcase, he liftshis arms and places the palm of his hands against his forehead as ifhe was trying to keep it from falling off his neck. It was as if time wasstanding still waiting for his disbelief to catch up with the reality ofthe situation. His wife was following through on her desire to be freeof the pressures of being the wife of a public figure. The expectations,the extensive travel, having to share her husband with the world hadcome to a head. She was now seeking a divorce. She was leaving afifteen year marriage; taking his kids; ending the only reality knownto William outside his ministry.

William collects his thoughts and proceeds to search for a note, amessage—anything that would make sense out of what has happened.He slowly lifts from his knees and heads for the kitchen. The phonemessage recorder light is blinking. As William moves toward themessage machine, there is heaviness in his chest. He senses that hisworst fears will be confirmed upon pushing the play button on theanswering machine. He hesitates, as if not playing the message wouldsomehow not validate what is happening. With his heart beating sohard he could hear the pounding in his ear, William pushes play. Themachine automated message plays, "You have one unheard message."The next voice he hears is a familiar one, it is his wife—Anna. Witha crackle in her voice she says, "By the time you hear this message thekids and I will be back in south Florida. I'm sorry. I tried to make itwork, but I can't live like this anymore. I've filed for divorce."

William immediately attempts to make contact with Anna totalk her out of the divorce. He was hoping that she would give themmore time to make sense out of what went wrong and how theycould possibly bring healing and repair to the situation. His attemptsto reach her were unsuccessful. Day after day, for two weeks, hewould call but to no avail. Anna would not return his call. Finally,William would once again pack his bags for a trip. This time itwouldn't be to speak to hundreds or thousands of eager listeners.This time he would be the uninvited, unwanted guest; imposing hisunsolicited message of hope to a reluctant audience of one.


Ft. Lauderdale Beach, Florida

Sitting across the road from the beach in a small café on A1Asipping a freshly brewed cup of cappuccino, thoughts of the pastfew weeks' tumultuous events churned vigorously inside William'smind. His brain had become numb from thinking too much. Witha dull headache, he pulls out his journal and begin to write, "Tearingthrough my heart and soul, there is an uneasiness, a gnawing inthe pit of my stomach that seem to consume every ounce of myattention—haunting me as I attempt once again to make sense ofit all. But how can I? This situation is more than I can bear. Myrelationship is in a shamble, I'm losing sleep, my work is suffering,and peace appears to ignore my deepest longing—my aching innateneed for a moment of emotional repair."

All of this was perplexing and upsetting. For at that time Williamhad already determined that divorce was an evil thing and the soonerthis part of his life was behind him the better. Optimistically andsecretly, of course—against the grim reality of a failed marriage, hewas hoping for reconciliation. Eventually, his marriage did end, hetoiled in disbelief. The man with the effervescent personality had losthis sense of humor and never seemed to laugh anymore. Perhaps thesaddest thing was that he had lost his enthusiasm and focus towardlife. It showed, emotionally, physically and spiritually.

As for his career, he hated it more bitterly than he could perhapsmake clear. In his mind, the thought that maybe he became thewretched prisoner of his own making; pursuing his passion to inspireand change lives, oblivious to the downward spiral of his home-life.The thought that the cost of his success would be at the expenseof his family oppressed him with an intolerable sense of guilt. Hecould get nothing into perspective. He had lost his sense of purpose.William was at that place where he was forced to confront thespiritual crisis of his out-of-balance life.

It is 9:37 p.m. The beach is nearly abandoned, only stragglers areleft. The traffic is thinning and the noise level is lowering. The calmof the night slowly ushered in a sense of completion to yet anotherday of urgency and unrest. Still, William is feeling the anxiousfeelings of uncertainty. He finishes his cappuccino, pays his dinnerbill and walked onto the sidewalk heading toward his car in a nearbyparking garage. As William attempted to turn the corner and enterthe garage, an unusual impression moved through his entire being.

It was as if he was overshadowed, immersed, and filled all inthat same moment. With what, he did not know. All he knew was,without a sound or an audible voice; he was suddenly encouraged towalk the shoreline of the beach. So he did.

Crossing A1A, approaching the shoreline, William felt anotherimpression. This time, he felt it was necessary to take off his shoesand socks and roll his pant leg bottom up. With his toes curlinginto the sand with each step, he began to walk the beach. Lookinginto the vastness of a dark night sky, after a while he began to feelthe water from the receding waves brush against his ankles. Hecontinued to walk. After a few minutes it occurred to him that hehad been drawn farther into the ocean than where he'd began. Thewater was now nearing his knees. The ocean's undertow had beenslowly pulling him out deeper with each cycle of recurring waves.

William's eyes had been focused upward at the stars; his earswere filled with the rhythmic sounds of ocean's breath. He wasmesmerized. So much so, he was unaware that he no longer wasconsumed with the worries that had plagued him earlier. Thepeace that he'd longed for, but couldn't find, was unconsciouslyand suddenly upon him. Before William could read into theexperience, the impression that overshadowed, immersed, andfilled him almost an hour earlier began to gently echo—a stillsmall voice from the deepest part of his human "self" saying, "Thisis how it feels to abide in My shadow. Here, you will experience anunknown peace; here you learn what it means to rest and be ledby Me, God—the Spirit."

At this point William understood that things were about tochange significantly in his life. He was about to turn another majorcorner in his life and God was watching. "Abiding in the Spirit," hesaid to himself. "But I've been teaching this principle most of myyoung life," he said to himself. He had no idea that the experiencesthat would follow over the next few years would mark a deeperconnection with the presence of the Divine. He would embrace aninvaluable truth that will change his life and ministry forever.

He remembered that throughout Scripture we are encouraged to"lean not to our own understanding." In all our ways acknowledgeGod, and He will direct our path—and he that dwells in thesecret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of theAlmighty." Here, in these simple verses, lie the secret of all successfulventures and transitions in life.

He would soon discover, on this life-changing odyssey, thatit is when we chose to make God a part of our very consciousnessand when we chose to live our lives walking in His shadow, that wefind true inner healing, refinement, and completeness. For William,the wake-up call to this reality happened the day he returned toSavannah. He began to discover a deeper relationship with God.He would now get to know another side of God—the God of how.


How singular is the thing called pleasureand how curiously related to pain,which might be thought to be the opposite of it ...yet he who pursues either is generally compelled to take the other;their bodies are two but they are joined by the same head.

~ Socrates

CHAPTER 2

God WILL Give You MoreThan You Can Handle


As a child growing up in an old Pentecostal church in St. Marys,Georgia, I remember hearing for the first time the phrase: "Godwill never give you more than you can handle." I was in the primarySunday school class of one of the "church mothers" who lived acrossthe street from the church. After hearing it and eventual quotingit for years, at some point; it became a Christian-ism for me. I feltcomforted knowing that God would never allow anything to happento me that I could not "handle," whatever that meant in the world ofChristendom. I am being somewhat cynical. But are we really awareof what that represent beyond the affirmation itself? Will I always beokay? Will things never be so terrible, as to crush me?

The real question that lurks in the back of our mind is, howmuch will this hurt? Whether it is emotional pain or physical pain,we all must prepare for the inevitable. Phillip Yancey, in his book,Where Is God When It Hurts?, had this to say, "When confrontedwith the facts, most of us will admit that pain—some pain, atleast—serves a good and useful purpose. Apart from the warningsystem it provides, hidden dangers would shadow our everydayexistence. Even more neglected, however, is the intimate connectionthat links pain and pleasure. The two sensations work together soclosely they sometimes become almost indistinguishable." Let's faceit, no one equates pain with pleasure nor with purpose. So when thephrase "God will not give you more than you can handle" is used, itimplies that there will be pain—unbearable pain which we expectto be minimized or avoided. The fact is, God sustains us to bearthat which would, under normal circumstances and without God'sassistance, not be able to handle or bear.

Paul, the Apostle, expressed the same sentiments:

Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anythingas coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God,who has made us sufficient to be. (2 Corinthians 3:5)

Also,

And God is able to make all grace abound to you, sothat having all sufficiency in all things at all times, youmay abound in every good work. (2 Corinthians 9:8)


These two verses of Scripture highlight the inability withinourselves to handle the unbearable weight of the many inevitablechallenges we will face in life. God will allow overwhelming andpotentially destructive circumstances to confront us and even comeupon us. But it is because of His sufficiency that we are able towithstand being crushed or face total annihilation.

If you could handle every unbearable circumstance that presentsitself, then there would be no need to transfer glory to God. In fact,how do you think Moses and the children of Israel felt when facedwith Pharaoh and his army behind them and the Red Sea in frontof them? Right! It was beyond their ability. It was more than theycould bear. Moses heard a word from God and said, Stand still andsee the salvation of the Lord (Exodus 14:13). Moses and the children ofIsrael knew that if it was left up to their own abilities and resourcesthat they would die right where they stood.

What about King Jehoshaphat? He was warned that threekingdoms (the children of Ammon, Moab, and Seir), were comingagainst his kingdom. His military forces were not sufficient towithstand the mighty battalions of three great kingdoms. He knewit, so called for the entire kingdom, even the animals, to fast beforeGod. If that wasn't bad enough, at the completion of the fast, Godinstructed Jehoshaphat not to engage his military forces in the fight.God's solution was for the king to bring his choir to the battle.

Really God? A choir? Yes! God knew how He was going toget glory out of the impossible situation confronting Jehoshaphat.Through obedience, proper positioning, and triumphant praise,God's sufficiency sustained King Jehoshaphat and Judah (hiskingdom). It was on the cliff of Ziz that God confirmed:

You shall not need to fight in this battle: set yourselves,stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord with you.And Jehoshaphat bowed his head with his face to theground: and all Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalemfeel before the Lord, worshipping the Lord (2Chronicles 20:16-18).


God will allow more on youthan you can handle. Becauseit is at this point you becomeaware of the omnipotent andinexhaustible power of God. Itis in the impossible settings inlife that you have no other choice but to transfer glory to God.In Jehoshaphat's case God set a divine "ambushment" against theenemy and utterly destroyed them. So it will be with you, God isorchestrating a divine how on your behalf. Your divine how maybe in the form of an unlikely career you are considering, a positionyou're applying for that appear to be out of reach, a financial burdenweighing heavy upon you, a physical illness or condition you thinkyou can't beat. Whatever your impossible or unbearable situationmay be, know that the God of how has got your back! He won't letyou down. With men this is impossible; but with God all things arepossible. (Matthew 19:26 KJV)

For William, in Chapter 1, divorce would prove to be one ofmany difficult situations that will come to test this statement offaith. I remember quite a few years ago even writing those words toa childhood friend of mine who was going through a difficult time.I felt like it was in the Bible. It seemed like it should be in the Bible.It sounded theologically sound and comforting. For years, like manyChristians, I had always quoted but had never actually check to see ifit was in the Bible. It is a common practice, if you hear it in churchfrom credible leaders and seasoned parishioners it must be true.

But then one day as I was in my study preparing for a speakingengagement I had a run-in with the truth. I discover that the whole"God won't give you more than you can handle" business was anerror. And that Satan has twisted that one and we've bought it.

The truth is, the Bible doesn't talk about giving or not giving usmore than we can handle. To embrace that at face value would lenditself to the assumption that you will never come under unbearablepressures in life and secondly, that you are responsible for the howof navigating through such pressures. There is no getting around thepressures and sufferings associated with life transitions. According toYancey, we meet suffering people in every school, in every church, inevery public building, as well as in every hospital. All of us will oneday join them. As I've listened to what they have to say, I have comeup with four " frontiers" where every suffering person will do battle:

"The frontiers of fear, helplessness, meaning, andhope. Our response to suffering depends largelyon the outcome of our struggle in those frontiers."


(Continues...)
Excerpted from The God of How by Preston Williams II. Copyright © 2013 Dr. Preston Williams II. Excerpted by permission of iUniverse LLC.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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Publisher
iUniverse
Publication date
2013
Language
English
ISBN 10 
1491711205
ISBN 13 
9781491711200
Binding
Paperback
Number of pages
240