The Secret Life of Families: How Secrets Shape Our Relationships and When and How to Tell the Truth - Softcover

Imber-Black, Evan

Softcover

ISBN 10: 072253714X ISBN 13: 9780722537145

Publisher: Thorsons, 1998

Synopsis

How Secrets Shape our Relationships and When and How to Tell the Truth

What are the consequences of keeping a family secret? When is it appropriate to tell the truth?

A renowned family therapist explores the compelling power of secrets to shape our lives. Through dozens of dramatic and moving personal stories., Dr. Imber-Black illuminates the dilemmas at the heart of family relationships and offers a fresh–and often surprising critique of our ‘tell-all’ society. She challenges the pop-psych doctrine that full disclosure is best and shows how new secrets (like artificial insemination) are being created as old taboos are broken, and how thoughtless ‘truth-telling’ can create years of dangerous fallout.

She offers realistic, compassionate guidance, covering such topics as:
• how family secrets create an ever expanding ‘zone of silence’
• the distinction between healthy privacy and toxic secrecy
• what to tell–and not to tell–young children

’A must-read book–daring, compassionate, timely, and eminently useful.’ Harriet Lerner

About this title

About the Author

Evan Imber-Black is a leading figure in famly therapy. She is the Director of the Urban Institute for Families and Family Training in the Department of Psychiatry at Albert Einstein College of Medicine. She is the author of many books including RITUALS FOR OUR TIMES. She lectures internationally and has appeared on Oprah and other TV programmes.

From the Back Cover

WHEN DO I HAVE THE RIGHT TO KEEP A SECRET?
WHO HAS A RESPONSIBILITY TO MAINTAIN A SECRET?
HOW CAN I MAKE THE DISTINCTION BETWEEN HEALTHY PRIVACY AND TOXIC SECRECY?

Secrets come in all shapes and sizes, and for families as well as individuals they are built on a complex web of shifting motives and emotions. But today, when personal revelations are posted on the Internet or sensationalized on tabloid television, we risk losing touch with how important secrets are – how they are used and abused, their power to harm and to heal. What we choose to share or to keep silent about can affect, for better or worse, our health, our work, our relationships, our future. Evan Imber-Black eloquently and compassionately describes how to maintain a balance between candour and caution.

Moving personal stories illuminate the dilemmas at the heart of family relationships (what if a grandparent has committed suicide? or what is appropriate to tell a child about their adoption or the cause of divorce?). This wise advice helps us embrace the complexities of secrets in our own lives. 'The Secret Life of Families' offers a perspective on some of today's most personal and social issues. It gives voice to our deepest fears and our power to overcome them. It is a book that will be talked about for years to come.

Evan Imber-Black Ph.D. is Professor of Psychiatry at Albert Einstein College of Medicine and is Director of the Ackerman Institute for Family Therapy. She is the author of 'Rituals for Our Times' and numerous professional publications. She lectures internationally and appears frequently on television.

"Evan Imber-Black unravels the complexities of silence and secrecy in family life with her usual brilliance and balance. She gives us a must-read book – daring, compassionate, timely and eminently useful."
HARRIET LERNER, author of 'The Dance of Anger'

Edition details

• Publisher: Thorsons
• Publication date: 1998
• Language: English
• ISBN 10: 072253714X
• ISBN 13: 9780722537145
• Binding: Paperback
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 320