Loving Him without Losing You: How to Stop Disappearing and Start Being Yourself - Hardcover

Engel, Beverly

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 0471355585 ISBN 13: 9780471355588

Publisher: Jossey Bass, 2000

Synopsis

This text explores the lives of women who sacrifice their own identities and self-esteem to their relationships with men, along with their chances for personal and professional growth. Th author discusses the psychological, sociological and biological roots of the problem. She provides quizzes women can take to determine if and to what degree they suffer from Disappearing Woman Syndrome. In addition she outlines a complete programme featuring dozens of empowering exercises and actions steps women can use to free themselves from the grip of this all too common disorder and transform themselves.

About this title

Review:

Although modern women are able to maintain a successful independent life , many still psychologically succumb to the old-fashioned societal expectation that their overriding role is to be a loving subservient mate to their man. By reading Loving Him Without Losing You, "women will come to understand that the tendency to lose themselves in relationships is partly a natural by-product of their cultural conditioning and biological hardwiring".

Beverly Engel, psychotherapist and author of numerous self-help books for women (such as Raising Your Sexual Self-Esteem), sets about explaining the phenomenon of the "Disappearing Woman". A woman who, in spite of being strong, secure and self-assured, forfeits her own personality and ignores her own needs whenever she enters into a romantic relationship.

Do you tend to fall head over heels in love quickly and intensely? Do you neglect friendships to be with your lover? Do you tend to undervalue and question your own feelings whenever they differ from your lover's? Do you need constant reassurance of your lover's feelings toward you? According to Engel, these are just some of the symptoms of "Disappearing Woman" syndrome.

Loving Him Without Losing You offers empathy and insight coupled with exercises and cures. By including excerpts of interviews with 47 subjects, the author illustrates the biological and sociological factors that cause women to become "emotional chameleons" and offers advice to those stuck in similar behavioural ruts. Empowering and encouraging, Losing Him Without Losing You is a must for all women who immerse themselves in their men. --Christopher Kelly

Review:

This book clearly explains why so many women find themselves in fantasy marriages and romances with real men. Beverly Engel urges women to think, evaluate, and risk rejection before they repeatedly jump into the same trap. In a gentle voice, she offers commonsense guidelines for telling the truth, learning to trust perceptions, and using solitude. --(Evelyn Streit Cohen, M.S., M.A., marriage and family therapist and coauthor of Couple Fits: How to Live with the Person You Love) A terrific book, written with authority and sensitivity to men as well as women--(.full of useful, fresh information.--(Bradley Gerstman, Esq., Christopher Pizzo, CPA, and Rich Seldes, M.D., authors of What Men Want and Marry Me!) "Groundbreaking, provocative, and substantial, this book will light the fire of every woman who seeks true intimacy and strength."--(Salli Rasberry, coauthor of Living Your Life Out Loud) An abundant supply of useful strategies . Unique for its readers--(Sheila A. Rogovin, Ph.D., psychotherapist and coauthor of Couple Fits: How to Live with the Person You Love) Again, Beverly Engel has identified a widespread problem and provided womenwith wise guidelines for bursting through it. She writes with compassion and insight. If you think you are a 'disappearing woman, you will drink in this book as if it were a health-giving elixir. It is!--(Susan Page, author of How One of You Can Bring the Two of You Together and If I'm So Wonderful, Why Am I Still Single?) "Loving Him without Losing You is a powerful and practical guide to relationships that every woman should read!"--(Barbara De Angelis, Ph.D., New York Times bestselling author of Secrets About Life Every Woman Should Know and Are You the One for Me?) "This is a book of depth and power. I highly recommend it not only to women who lose themselves in their relationships with men but to the parents of adolescent girls who need to be taught how to view themselves as valuable beings separate from their relationships with men and boys."--(Michael Gurian, author of The Good Son and A Fine Young Man) "When I was in college, we were all Disappearing Women. We didn't even think about it; that's just the way things were. Some of us grew out of it; some didn't. If we all had had this book, our lives might have turned out much differently. Buy this book so you can become your authentic self."--(Randi Kreger, coauthor of Stop Walking on Eggshells) "In Loving Him Without Losing You Beverly Engel offers powerful wisdom and insight concerning the age-old problem of women losing themselves in their relationships with men. Unlike so many others, Beverly doesn't take the easy way out by blaming men but instead explores the phenomenon from a biological, cultural, and psychological perspective and offers women empowering suggestions about how to take responsibility for changing their situations."--(Patti McDermott, author of How to Talk to Your Husband; How to Talk to Your Wife) "Loving Him Without Losing You is a wonderful resource and guide to finding oneself and tapping into creativity as a part of one's foundation for a life well lived. I recommend it highly."--(Lucia Capacchione, Ph.D., author of Visioning: Ten Steps to Designing the Life of Your Dreams andThe Creative Journal)

About this edition

• Publisher: Jossey Bass
• Publication date: 2000
• ISBN 10: 0471355585
• ISBN 13: 9780471355588
• Binding: Hardcover
• Number of pages: 304