The Respect Effect: Using the Science of Neuroleadership to Inspire a More Loyal and Productive Workplace (BUSINESS BOOKS) - Hardcover

MESHANKO

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 0071816097 ISBN 13: 9780071816090

Publisher: McGraw Hill, 2013

Synopsis

Publisher's Note: Products purchased from Third Party sellers are not guaranteed by the publisher for quality, authenticity, or access to any online entitlements included with the product.
What does every employee want? In a word: RESPECT

The best leaders are the ones who motivate employees to want to perform at the highest level possible--which is never accomplished with an iron-fist style of management. The best results are achieved through one of the most basic human behaviors: the showing of respect.

Organizational change expert Paul Meshanko has studied how the human brain responds in various workplace situations--and his conclusion is astonishing: People perform at their highest level when treated with respect. Conversely, when an employee is emotionally attacked by disrespectful behavior, he or she shuts down. In The Respect Effect, Meshanko reveals the transformational power of respect in the workplace.

Given the pressures of the workplace, this is sometimes easier said than done. So Meshanko provides a practical action plan you can use to train yourself or others to get on track--and stay on track. His proven strategy helps you understand the initial, biological reactions to what people (This means you!) say and do.

Through his cited research in neuroscience, Meshanko teaches you how to create positive situations, avoid negative ones, and ultimately build a better work environment for everyone. The Respect Effect explains:

• The hard science proving why respect is the most powerful employee motivator
• How to build a corporate culture based on respect, starting with senior leadership
• The 12 Rules of Respect--simple but powerful ways to communicate respectfully in any situation
• The strategy, resource requirements, and tools for sustaining a respectful workplace culture

How do you use the concept of neuroscience to achieve a great work environment? The answer is obvious. Feed others a diet of respect--real, deserved, genuine respect--and you will see amazing things happen in your organization.

Use Meshanko's proven approach to organizational change to create a culture of contagious respect in your organization.

About this title

About the Author

Paul Meshanko is an author, internationally recognized speaker, and business leader with over 20 years of experience in corporate training and organizational culture change. He is the founder of Legacy Business Cultures, a global provider of employee training, organizational surveys, and executive coaching. LegacyCultures.

From the Back Cover

PRAISE FOR THE RESPECT EFFECT

"The Respect Effect reminds us of the critical role relationships play in the workforce. . . . A greatread for new and experienced leaders!" -- ANNEMARIE M. GRASSI, PH.D., CEO, Open Doors Academy

"The Respect Effect offers concise, engaging learning, not only for business leaders, but for anyoneworking in an organization where developing an inclusive and productive work environment is a priority. Respect is a powerful principle for businesses to understand and practice--this book will contribute much to its advancement." -- RICK CHIRICOSTA, President and CEO, Medical Mutual

"[Meshanko] shows how demonstrating respect to employees leads to better health and well-being for both the organization and the individual. Whether you are a supervisor, manager, VP, or small business owner, The Respect Effect will make you a more effective leader." -- PAUL MARCIANO, PH.D., author, Carrots and Sticks Don't Work

"In The Respect Effect, Paul Meshanko shows that respect is the foundation for interpersonal trust, revealing why high-trust organizations are successful. The step-by-step process Meshanko outlines to cultivate and nurture respect provides a new leverage point to increase employee satisfaction and productivity." -- PAUL J. ZAK, PH.D., author, The Moral Molecule

"Paul's book inspires us to keep our focus and gives us concrete behaviors for living the attributes of The Respect Effect." -- RALPH STAYER, owner and CEO, Johnsonville Sausage, LLC

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

The Respect Effect

How to Use the Science of Neuroleadership to Inspire a More Loyal and Productive Workplace

By Paul B. Meshanko

McGraw-Hill Education

Copyright © 2013 Paul B. Meshanko
All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-0-07-181609-0

Contents

PREFACE
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
INTRODUCTION: Why Focus on Respect?
PART I The Road to Respect
CHAPTER 1: A Transformational Power
CHAPTER 2: Connected Through Evolution
CHAPTER 3: Our Brains on Respect
CHAPTER 4: The Destructive Power of Disrespect
CHAPTER 5: Why We Treat Each Other Poorly
PART II Tools for Building Respectful Work Cultures
CHAPTER 6: Respect Starts with Awareness
CHAPTER 7: The 12 Rules of Respect
CHAPTER 8: Changing Behavior Is the Key
CHAPTER 9: Self-Esteem: The Art of Respecting Ourselves
CHAPTER 10: Integrity: The Glue That Holds Respect Together
PART III The Path Forward
CHAPTER 11: A Blueprint for Respectful Organizations
CHAPTER 12: Respect Outside of Work
FINAL THOUGHTS
APPENDIX: Sample Affirmative Reminders
NOTES
REFERENCES
INDEX

CHAPTER 1

A Transformational Power

While there have been many proud moments in my career, one of the most memorablewas a three-month period in 1987. I was in the second quarter of a two-terminternship with the Bendix Heavy Vehicle division of AlliedSignal Corporation. Iwas fortunate to report to a man named Larry Taylor, who remains one of the bestmanagers I can ever remember having. What made Larry special as a manager wasthat he never treated me as anything other than a fully competent associate,even though I was still a college student. His management style was to probe theouter edges of my intelligence, problem-solving skills, and creativity on acontinual basis.

One particular assignment still makes me smile every time I think back to it.One day, Larry said that he had an important project for me. The company wasconsidering an acquisition, and he wanted me to prepare a full strategicanalysis of the companies being considered. More importantly, he asked that Icome back to him with a recommendation once my analysis was complete. I rememberfeeling both excited and frightened. For a kid still in college, this was thekind of project that would require me to pull from every business discipline Ihad been exposed to up until that point.

The project took almost two months to complete. In the end, I presented a fullanalysis of three potential acquisition targets, including their financialstrength, market position, reputation within our industry, and range of productsand services. While all three companies were attractive candidates, there wasone that stood out to me as clearly being the best target. My analysis andrecommendations, including multiple graphs and charts, took the form of a 60-page report with my name squarely on the cover page. I still remember walkinginto Larry's office, handing it to him, and proudly saying, "Here you go." Atthat time, it represented not only a meaningful departure from term papers andcase studies, but it was also the best work I was capable of producing.

Later that afternoon, my desk phone rang, and Larry asked me to come to hisoffice. He said, "I have reviewed your report and recommendation, and it isexcellent. It's so good that I have already sent it to Dave and would like youto present it to him in person tomorrow." Dave was Larry's boss and responsiblefor all aftermarket strategy and marketing for our group.

This level of recognition for my work, and its implied confidence in me, wassomewhat unexpected. What an impact it had. The euphoria and motivation itinstilled in me lasted for years. It set the stage for me to accept thecompany's offer to work for it as a fulltime employee once I graduated fromcollege even though I had two offers at slightly higher starting salaries.

Looking back through the 25-year lens of my experiences, it's only now that Ifully appreciate the complex and powerful forces put into play that year. Morethan anything, Larry primed my emotional pump by treating me in a manner thatmade me feel smart, capable, and important. He also helped me feel like I waspart of the team and see how my contributions played an integral part in thelong-term strategic and financial success of the business. While he probablydidn't realize it at the time, his intentional and consistent demonstration ofrespect for me as a person and young professional helped set in motion theproductive and rewarding trajectory for the first 10 years of my professionalcareer. Because of his communication of confidence in me, I developed a powerfulemotional tie to both my boss and the company. Whether it's a project,acquisition, or purchase of equipment, either mentally or physically businessesmap their return on investment (ROI). In this case, the investment was in me,and the return was the maximum engagement of my skills for the betterment of thecompany. What can a company do to maximize the return on investment it's made inits employees? A good starting place is to make respect an integral part of thecompany's corporate culture.

CHAPTER 2

Connected Through Evolution

One of the most illuminating perspectives on human interaction that I've readrecently was in Daniel Goleman's book, Primal Leadership. Goleman refers tohuman beings as "open loop systems." From an evolutionary perspective, ourspecies is more connected to each other than most people realize. Over thecourse of millions of years, our ancestors developed highly specialized braincircuitry that constantly monitored other people when we were in their presence.In psychology, there's a concept called theory of mind which refers to theability to identify mental states (beliefs, desires, intentions, perspectives,etc.) in ourselves and others, and to realize that the two states are oftendifferent. Grasping this basic difference in orientations was a remarkable anduniquely human adaptation. In a world of limited resources, it was theequivalent of developing our own personal threat detection systems.

From an evolutionary perspective, this makes complete sense. The ability topredict accurately the peaceful or hostile intentions of new people or animalsliterally promoted the longevity of our species. What is fascinating about thiscircuitry is that it's forever in the "on" mode. What this means is that we'realways monitoring other people around us, and they're doing the same. Ourconclusions about the intentions of others have a profound effect on how therest of our brain functions. Informed by inputs from our five senses, our brainsperform a delicate and instinctual dance every day in the name of self-preservation.

Armed with this complex warning system, the human brain is the world's mostsophisticated survival computer ever developed. Whenever our senses pick up cuesthat could indicate that we are or could be in the presence of danger, ancientneural pathways become activated to get us out of harm's way as quickly andeffectively as possible. This is the realm of fight or flight. So powerful arethese impulses that they literally commandeer the brain and order all othernonessential thinking functions to go dormant. This means that all our higher-orderbrain capabilities, such as problem solving, reasoning, evaluatingalternatives, planning, socializing, and empathizing, are subordinated toprotecting ourselves in the presence of perceived threats. This includes morethan just physical threats; it also includes threats to our emotional well-being,social status, financial security, and future opportunities.

Conversely, when we interpret cues from others to mean that we are safe in theirmidst, our higher-level thought processes go back online, and we return to anormal level of thinking and intellectual/operational output. This "all systemssafe" mode of brain function is hopefully where most of us spend the majority ofour waking hours getting things done for our employers, our families, andourselves.

From a workplace perspective, there is a mode that's more beneficial anddesirable than "all systems safe." It is the mode in which we function when weperceive ourselves to be free from danger and in the presence of those whoappreciate us, value what we contribute, and deem our best effort as beingessential to the overall success of the group. It is also the mode in which weare constructively challenged, given opportunities and resources to besuccessful, and can share in the rewards of our collaboration with others. Whenwe operate in this type of rich, stimulating, and emotionally nourishingenvironment, our brains are more productive than normal. They release powerfulneurotransmitters that stimulate our creativity and our desire to workcollaboratively; they also allow us to find deep personal satisfaction in ourwork. This is the respect effect.

The Neurology of Human Interaction

Human evolution and biology play significant roles in determining how weinteract and behave around each other. Our brains are wired for speed andefficiency and powered almost exclusively by glucose, which is the form of sugarour bodies metabolize from carbohydrates. Because we have limited supplies ofglucose available throughout the day, one of our natural, and oftenunacknowledged biases is to stay in environments that are familiar and useneural pathways that are already well-developed. When we're surrounded by peoplewho are like us (or at least very familiar to us), we expend less glucose(energy) to understand their actions and predict their intentions. Thispreference for familiarity, predictability, and safety is likely one of theunderlying factors that drove our ancestors to form tribes.

When we're around people for whom we have no first-hand reference points, ourbrains immediately try to match what we can perceive about them (visually,audibly, and through our sense of smell) to patterns that already exist.According to authors Marsh, Mendoza-Denton, and Smith:

Neuroscience has shown that people can identify another person's apparent race,gender, and age in a matter of milliseconds. In this blink of an eye, a complexnetwork of stereotypes, emotional prejudices, and behavioral impulsesactivates.

These mental shortcuts allow us to quickly evaluate people and our relativesafety around them. There is strong evidence that they also permit the brain toconsume less of the body's precious supply of glucose. When we have no existingreference points for a person, event, or situation, the brain must work harderand burn considerably more energy to program new neuronal reference points andsynaptic pathways. Think of it as the difference between driving down a highwayversus having to build that highway in the first place. Once our "highways" arebuilt, we are comfortable staying on them as much as possible. To a degree, thisanalogy helps underscore the power and persistence of stereotypes to influenceour perceptions and initial interaction behaviors with others.

What Is Respect?

The word respect has its origins in the Latin noun respectus, which translatesliterally to: the act of looking back, and the Latin verb, respicere, whichmeans to look back. Today, the actual word, as it pertains to people, hasevolved to be defined by Merriam-Webster the following ways:

Respect: noun - 1) the act of giving particular attention: consideration, 2)high or special regard: esteem, 3) the quality of being esteemed.

Respect: verb - 1a) to consider worthy of high regard: esteem, 1b) to refrainfrom interfering with, 2) to have reference to: concern.

Respect is a word with enormous scope that has gradually morphed to meandifferent things since its first use in the fourteenth century. What makes theword so important is that, when experienced, it triggers powerful, positiveemotions that not only feel good but change our behaviors. Of criticalsignificance is that these emotional responses seem to be universal. While theactions and decisions that trigger the feeling of being respected will vary fromperson to person and culture to culture, the core emotion is experiencedidentically in all human beings. Respect feels the same, no matter your age,race, gender, religion, or level of intelligence or ability. Similarly, theneurological responses to being treated with respect appear to be universal. Wewill explore these later.

A Forward-Looking Definition

I suggest the following as a reference point for further exploring respect as acultural component:

Respect is an active process of nonjudgmentally engaging people from allbackgrounds. It is practiced to increase our awareness and effectiveness anddemonstrated in a manner that esteems both us and those with whom we interact.

One implication of this definition is that it doesn't permit complacency or astatus quo level of social comfort. The genuine pursuit of respect requireseffort, takes time, and will likely feel awkward occasionally as we pushourselves to engage people from whom we have historically kept our distance.Neurologically, the more different from us others appear, the more energy ourbrains have to expend to categorize and make sense of the differences. Part ofthis mental effort is spent creating new neural pattern circuits. Another partis spent turning down the volume of our inner voices that want to use shortcutsto process the differences.

When defining respect, the inclusion of esteem also deserves discussion. Whetheror not our interactions with others have been successful in conveying respectwill depend on the emotional state of others after interacting with us. If ourefforts have succeeded, the desired result is for those we interact with to feelvalued in some way, as colleagues, coworkers, friends, neighbors, or simply aspeople. When we make ourselves partially responsible for the emotional well-being of those around us, it enhances our own sense of esteem. Think of it asthe "pay it forward" effect.

What this definition does not mean is that all our conversations with otherswill be pleasant and that difficult situations can't be discussed. It's quitethe opposite. This definition of respect actually requires that we engage incandid conversations with individuals with whom we have problems. If employeeswho report to us are not performing at the required level, it is critical thatwe share this information with them. In order to maintain or build esteem in aperson whose performance is inadequate, it is important that we separate theperson from the performance. We can give candid feedback about theirperformance, while letting the individual know that we value him as a person andwant him to succeed. Even more impactful is making it clear that our intent isto do whatever we can to help them become successful. From the perspective ofthe people receiving feedback, they are more willing to hear critical feedbackabout their performance provided they feel cared about as a person and thatsomeone is committed to helping them meet their requirements.

Respect Is Not Tolerance

Imagine that your spouse, partner, or significant other came home from work oneFriday afternoon and, with a smile on his or her, enthusiastically declared thathe loved his job because his boss and coworkers tolerated him. We would probablylook at him as if he had a screw loose because the feeling of being toleratedand his expression of joy didn't match! Most people don't associate the feelingof being tolerated with overt happiness, smiles, and energy. That's not to saythat tolerance is bad; it's simply a mediocre standard given the alternatives.Think of it as receiving a rating of "average" on your performance review. It'snot an unsatisfactory, but it doesn't put your workplace performance at a levelthat can lead to a personal and/or monetary reward.

Whenever we interact with others, either at work or in our private lives, thereis a broad range of possible behaviors that we can demonstrate (see Figure 2.1).Tolerating others is a neutral position. It is not positive or negative in itsimpact and requires little energy to initiate and sustain. This is why peopletypically perceive themselves as being tolerant. When surveyed, most peopleindicate that they are more tolerant than those around them (the "better thanaverage" effect). We would find it difficult to refute these internal andusually unspoken, beliefs because the demonstration of tolerance has fewbehaviors or actions associated with it. The possible exception is when we arearound others who we perceive to be annoying; then tolerance requires effort.

Once we move away from the relatively passive mode of simply tolerating others,we start exerting energy, typically mental and occasionally physical. We startbehaving around others in relation to our perceptions of what their presencesignifies. Those behaviors are predicated on our stored knowledge, including thestereotypes that we have about them or people like them. Here's where ourevolutionary instincts enter into the equation. Our first genetically imprinteddirective is to remain safe. People feel safest when they are around others whoare like them. The problem is that given the vast range of dissimilarities amongpeople, we perceive most people as different from us. A colleague suggested tome years ago that many of us unintentionally alienate ourselves from othersmerely by our self-perceived sense of "terminal uniqueness."

(Continues...)

Excerpted from The Respect Effect by Paul B. Meshanko. Copyright © 2013 Paul B. Meshanko. Excerpted by permission of McGraw-Hill Education.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

Edition details

• Publisher: McGraw Hill
• Publication date: 2013
• Language: English
• ISBN 10: 0071816097
• ISBN 13: 9780071816090
• Binding: Hardcover
• Number of pages: 241