Being Here When I Need Me: An Inner Journey (Spiritual growth) - Softcover

King, Vivian

Softcover

ISBN 10: 0953081117 ISBN 13: 9780953081110

Publisher: Inner Way Productions, 1998

Synopsis

Take a journey into the heartland of yourself, where you will meet your inner healer, creative genie and beloved Self, who is always here to love, understand and support you. With its unique combination of mysticism and science, this book will help bring you home to the Self. As you rest in the meadow by the brook, make your way through the forest, and climb the mountains of your mind, you will discover what is profoundly meaningful and holy. You will have the inner strength to be with others without losing your sacred centre. You will never need to walk alone again. 'Being Here When I Need Me provides a natural way to open to your higher Self. It is down-to-earth, comprehensive, clarifying, and powerful. Vivian King's approach to Psychosynthesis is both inspirational and scholarly. I highly recommend this book to those committed to personal and spiritual growth, and to all humanity.' Edith Stauffer, PhD Founder/Director of Psychosynthesis International, author of Unconditional Love and Forgiveness

About this title

From the Publisher:

Being Here When I Need Me is about self-exploration and self-discovery. In our rapidly changing world, it is no longer an indulgence to focus on self-development; rather it is a necessity for survival. This is not just another book on individualism or self-absorption. Nor is it a book to fuel narcissism. Instead of sanctioning selfishness or social passivity, Being Here When I Need Me calls you back home to yourself so you will have the stamina to focus on important family, community and world situations. It speaks to the sense of powerlessness, loss of purpose and feelings of emptiness that many feel because of social alienation, the fleeting rewards of material possessions and the lack of connection with the sacred. When you are here for yourself, you will no longer be dependent on material things or on other people to satisfy your innermost desires. You will be free to relate to others without losing your sense of self. This book will connect you with what is profoundly meaningful and holy, filling the inner void with peace. A peaceful inner world is the backdrop for a peaceful outer world.

From the Author:

I know what it feels like when Iım not Œhere for meı. I know what itıs like to give myself away in bits and pieces until I feel like a Nobody. Itıs a very hollow feeling and I wander around looking for Œsomethingı or Œsomeoneı to fill the void. Fortunately, I also know what itıs like when I am here for me, and thatıs why I have written this book. Being Here When I Need Me is really the title of my own inner journey Š I had the good fortune of growing up on a farm in what I thought was the most beautiful place in the world ­ Kansas. I was seen, loved and trusted by my down-to-earth Christian parents who provided the fertile soil for my growth. They were true gardeners of my spirit. They nurtured my four brothers and me and watched us blossom without trying to change our colors or patterns. They trusted our unfolding.

My parents expressed love openly. I never questioned their faithfulness or loyalty. I felt safe and secure and sensed from an early age that somehow my family experience was unusual. I believed I was the luckiest girl in the world because I belonged to our family and lived on our farm. I loved our land with its golden wheat fields and its rich, aromatic alfalfa pastures. It seemed like the cottonwood trees ­ majestic sentinels lining the banks of the Arkansas River ­ sang to me. I was a nature sprite, climbing trees and going barefoot as long as the season permitted. I walked through soft grass, sticker patches, cow pies and clods of earth turned over by the plow. The land, the farm, the animals and the family were all an organic part of life.

In contentment and gratitude I wanted to give back to the world the good fortune I had been given. I sensed that my purpose in life was to bring love and healing to those suffering from a lack of love.

In college I trained as a nurse. During my second year I married a theology student who was tall, dark and handsome. When we first met, my ŒPrinceı told me about his unhappy childhood. His mother had suffered from chronic depression, his parents were divorced and he and his sisters and brother were placed in a foster home. He had grown up with very little emotional support and, in my innocence, I believed I could give this man the love he lacked.

During the following years I experienced a subtle sense of disillusionment and confusion for the first time in my life. I didnıt really enjoy nurseıs training, but I struggled valiantly to fit into the medical structure. I wasnıt really happy in my marriage, either, but I tried hard to convince my husband that I loved him.

My sense of disillusionment deepened when as a nurse I realized I was merely Œbinding woundsı. Instead of getting to the heart of the problems people were experiencing, I was treating only the physical aspect of disease. I wasnıt addressing the cause of illness or integrating the components of healing in a holistic way.

Attempting to get closer to the heart of what causes human suffering, I worked as a psychiatric nurse where I learned to identify, understand and treat mental and emotional illnesses. Yet, while I was gaining a certain amount of psychological sophistication regarding pathology, I was experiencing a sense of loss, a subtle depression of spirit. This existential dilemma was compounded by the discontent of my marriage. As my husband struggled to become alive, I fought a feeling of deadness.

Why, I asked, with my psychological and theological tools and philosophical orientation to life, was my spirit numbed? An inner voice kept saying, ŒI am just not myself. Iım not here for me.ı I knew my intentions for healing were good, and my love was consistent and powerful, but good intentions and love were not enough. There was something missing and in this state of distress I earnestly began my search for truth and clarity.

... Along the road I took a workshop introducing Psychosynthesis, a transpersonal psychology developed by an Italian psychiatrist, Dr Roberto Assagioli. His work was brought to the United States in the early 1970s and was taught in private homes around the country. I recognized the importance of this approach immediately.

In a moment of déjà vu, I exclaimed, ³My self is always with me. I can stand by my self.² Seeing my dispirited self standing by my spirited Self, I was overjoyed. It further occurred to me that even if everyone I knew deserted me, my spirit Self would never leave or betray me.

About this edition

• Publisher: Inner Way Productions
• Publication date: 1998
• ISBN 10: 0953081117
• ISBN 13: 9780953081110
• Binding: Paperback
• Edition number: 2
• Number of pages: 212