We Have to Talk: Healing Dialogues Between Women and Men - Hardcover

Shem, Samuel; Surrey, Janet

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 0465080634 ISBN 13: 9780465080632

Publisher: Basic Books, 1998

Synopsis

Outlines a program of dialogues designed to help men and women in committed relationships talk to each other when difficulties arise

About this title

Synopsis:

Samuel Shem and Janet Surrey, a remarkable husband-and-wife team, challenge bestselling books that say men and women must resign themselves to inherent differences between them. Drawing on their extensive clinical experience as psychiatrist and psychologist, Shem and Surrey outline a program of healing dialogues to help any couple move beyond superficial harmony to genuine connection.. Are gender differences instinctive and immutable? Must men and women resign themselves to accepting these inherent differences and learning to outwit the opposite sex, as some recent bestsellers suggest? Drawing on their highly successful workshops, the authors of this important book argue against these manipulative tactics and outline a program to help couples move closer together (or if they must move apart, to do so with less blame). } We have to talk. For many men, these are the four worst words in the English language, especially when theyre uttered by a female partner. But it doesnt have to be that way, argue Samuel Shem and Janet Surrey in their pathbreaking and practical new book.

Male relational dreadthat all-too-familiar reaction set off by womens relational yearningscan be tamed, and in its place can emerge true satisfaction for men and women.To demonstrate how this is done, Shem and Surrey take us behind the scenes of their popular workshops. We hear couples speak intimately about anger, guilt, resentment, shame, and sex. We watch them wrestle collectively with the gender divide in their relationshipsthe deep disconnects, or impasses, that reflect the vastly different developmental paths men and women have traveled. We see couples learn to bridge the poles of dread and yearning, to emerge from isolation into mutuality. We witness their moments of sadness, humor, and, ultimately, discovery.Filled with moving stories of real people struggling with real problems, We Have to Talk shatters the rules and offers dramatic proof that men and women are not from different planets after all. It is certain to be seen as the relationship book for the new millennium. }

About the Author:

Samuel Shem, M.D., (the pen name of Dr. Stephen J. Bergman) and Janet Surrey, Ph.D., are on the faculties of the Harvard Medical School and the Stone Center at Wellesley College. They lecture frequently and conduct workshops and gender dialogues, most recently working with children in public and private schools to create a true coeducation. Samuel Shem is the bestselling author of the novels The House of God, Fine, and Mount Misery, and, with Janet Surrey, the play Bill W. and Dr. Bob. Janet Surrey is the co-author of Women’s Growth in Connection: Writings from the Stone Center. The authors live in Newton, MA. Samuel Shem, M.D., (the pen name of Dr. Stephen J. Bergman) and Janet Surrey, Ph.D., are on the faculties of the Harvard Medical School and the Stone Center at Wellesley College. They lecture frequently and conduct workshops and gender dialogues, most recently working with children in public and private schools to create a true coeducation. Samuel Shem is the bestselling author of the novels The House of God, Fine, and Mount Misery, and, with Janet Surrey, the play Bill W. and Dr. Bob. Janet Surrey is the co-author of Women’s Growth in Connection: Writings from the Stone Center. The authors live in Newton, MA.

About this edition

• Publisher: Basic Books
• Publication date: 1998
• ISBN 10: 0465080634
• ISBN 13: 9780465080632
• Binding: Hardcover
• Number of pages: 225