The Mothers Voice OBE/R - Hardcover

Weingarten

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 0151626804 ISBN 13: 9780151626809

Publisher: Thomson Learning, 1994

Synopsis

After learning she had breast cancer, Kathy Weingarten - a family therapist and mother of two - became acutely aware of the crippling cultural messages about mothering that kept her from sharing herself intimately with her children. "I wanted to understand why I was so willing to let my children express themselves, " she writes, "but so uncertain how to express myself with them." Drawing on the tools and case histories of her professional life, the example of her own loving (and beloved) but constrained mother, and the experience of conveying her post-diagnosis feelings to her children, Kathy Weingarten charts an invaluable and inspiring course in working toward a collaborative, non-hierarchical family life. She defies traditional attitudes about response to a child's gender, the importance of fathers, the true nature of listening, and the meaning of separation. She questions the conventional wisdom about mothers that catches them between representing themselves accurately to their families and representing themselves acceptably. Although mindful of not burdening children with more information than they should bear, this stirring book carries the crucial message that children can't be properly prepared for their own intense lives without knowing the ways their loved ones cope with theirs. And, no less important, that intimacy is achieved only through honesty of expression - the authentic, not the "good, " mother's voice. To the silenced parent, Kathy Weingarten offers relief, clarity, and direction.

About this title

Review

"Explores a central dilemma of mothering: When and how should mothers speak to children about their own stories and feelings, or, more generally, about realities of family life, power, and death. This is a courageous, honest, and above all, useful book." --Sara Ruddick, author of "Maternal Thinking""Gives expression to the experience of mothers, which has long been underplayed in the literature. Weingarten draws on the experience of breast cancer that challenged her to use her own voice and become 'unsilenced.' She has made an excellent contribution to understanding the many cultural dimensions of mothering. I highly recommend this uplifting book to all mothers--and fathers, too." --Alvin F. Poussaint, M.D., Clinical Professor of Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School"An important book that is at once eye-opening and heart-felt. With profound empathy for her clients' inner perspectives and a willingness to examine her own experience, Kathy Weingarten puts a human face on her theories." --Ronald F. Levant, Ed.D., Faculty, Harvard Medical School"An exquisite illumination of the maternal mystique. Through Weingarten's many accomplished voices--autobiographer, clinician, social scientist, theorist, advocate, mother--we hear about the mother's world, where intimacy is generally expected but, at times, pointlessly and cruelly proscribed by social norms. She shows us how the value of all of us may hinge less on how 'good' we are in our specified roles than on the authenticity of our dialogue with ourselves and with others. This book holds up an important lens to family life. It will also give men a rare chance to overhear the inner debate of the women in our lives. It signals us to quiet down and attend to their voices--and to our own." --Richard Chasin, M.D., President, American Family Therapy Academy "Wise and engaging....Weingarten has arrived at a stunning set of insights about what is possible--and worth striving for--across the generational divide. In place of the selfless maternal ideal with its connotations of one-way giving, she proposes a richer set of relational dynamics centered around a more complex reciprocity....Intimacy is the heart of Weingarten's book, and her reflections on it shine with a hard-won clarity." --"The Women's Review of Books" .,."told in an intimate and conversational manner, this book opens up new ways for families to communicate, share, and cope across gender and generational lines." --"Feminist Bookstore News" ""The Mother's Voice" is a thoughtful, well-written, accessible book that looks at the family in a nontraditional, even radical, way. Weingarten raises many provocative questions about the structure of the family and provides readers with some useful suggestions for improving family relationships." --"The Boston Globe" "Weingarten's gradual approach to a kind of 'liberated mothering' is a nurturing and reliable model." --"Publishers Weekly" "Weingarten challenges traditional concepts of parents' relationships with each other and their children and proposes a feminist, nonpatriarchal model for families. This book will be a valuable addition to public libraries and academic libraries supporting family studies, psychotherapy, and counseling programs." --"Library Journal"

About the Author

Kathy Weingarten, PhD, is Co-Director of the Program in Narrative Therapies at The Family Institute of Cambridge and Assistant Professor of Psychology at Harvard Medical School. The author of numerous articles and the editor of several books, she speaks internationally on mothers' lives, narrative therapy, and illness.

About this edition

• Publisher: Thomson Learning
• Publication date: 1994
• ISBN 10: 0151626804
• ISBN 13: 9780151626809
• Binding: Hardcover
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 288