The Year of the Horses: A Memoir - Hardcover

Maum, Courtney

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 1953534155 ISBN 13: 9781953534156

Publisher: Tin House Books, 2022

Synopsis

At the age of thirty-seven, Courtney Maum finds herself in an indoor arena in Connecticut, moments away from stepping back into the saddle. For her, this is not just a riding lesson, but a last-ditch attempt to pull herself back from the brink even though riding is a relic from the past she walked away from. She hasn't been on or near a horse in over thirty years.

Although Maum does know what depression looks like, she finds herself refusing to admit, at this point in her life, that it could look like her: a woman with a privileged past, a mortgage, a husband, a healthy child, and a published novel. That she feels sadness is undeniable, but she feels no right to claim it. And when both therapy and medication fail, Courtney returns to her childhood passion of horseback riding as a way to recover the joy and fearlessness she once had access to as a young girl. As she finds her way, once again, through the world of contemporary horseback riding--Courtney becomes reacquainted with herself not only as a rider but as a mother, wife, daughter, writer, and woman. Alternating timelines and braided with historical portraits of women and horses alongside history's attempts to tame both parties, The Year of the Horses is an inspiring love letter to the power of animals--and humans--to heal the mind and the heart.

About this title

About the Author

Courtney Maum is the author of the novels Costalegre, Touch, and I Am Having So Much Fun Here Without You, and an award-winning guide for writers, Before and After the Book Deal. A writing coach and educator, Courtney's mission is to help people hold on to the joy of art-making in a culture obsessed with turning artists into brands. Courtney's essays and articles about creativity have been widely published in outlets like The New York Times, The Guardian, and Interview. She lives in Litchfield County, Connecticut, with her family, where she runs a nonprofit learning collaborative for artists called The Cabins.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

I park the Nissan Cube we’ve replaced our totaled Toyota with outside what appears to be a covered riding arena. It’s the first time I’ve come anywhere near an equestrian facility in over thirty years. The dirt gives way under my car tires: it’s been a rainy fall.

I’m not at this barn in northern Massachusetts to ride—or so I tell myself. I am here to research. With the September 2015 deadline for my second novel missed, I’m trying to play catch-up. There is a male character in my manuscript who is a dressage champion with a horse-breeder mother who works out of a barn near the ocean in Cape Cod. I know precious little about either of these undertakings, and so I’ve driven two hours north from the Berkshires to talk to someone who does: Amanda Traber, a famed dressage trainer whose barn is near the Cape but not on it, because one of the first things Amanda will set straight about my fiction is that it costs an unholy fortune to have a horse barn by the sea.

To quiet the sheepishness I feel about imposing my quest for fleshed-out characters onto a busy stranger, I run through the questions I’ve prepared. What makes a dressage horse talented? How did Amanda get into the sport? How does she talk about her passion to people who don’t ride? I feel both ill at ease and excited to be at a stable as a writer instead of as a rider. It steadies my nerves to focus on the writing part.

Amanda is waiting for me just past the stall mats in the facility’s entrance, and the short walk gives me several beats to collect myself after the smash of the barn smell. Once I actually start riding again, I will talk with women who were pulled back into horse madness by the siren of that smell alone.

In terms of the perfume hitting, there is the animal musk first—the sun-warmed, dirty honey of the place where large head meets muscled neck, the encapsulated summer scent of flaked hay, peaty manure, the reek of riding gloves that never truly dry, the stench of humid fly sheets folded by horse stalls. But underneath these organic smells lie the deeply personal: the acrid punch of the oil dripping underneath my mother’s waiting Wagoneer, the sudden tang of cologne wafting up from the front hall, which meant my father was home from Wall Street early. The smell of the linseed oil my mother rubbed and rubbed on my giant Christmas present in hopes that the wooden horse would be easier to rock.

“Remind me what you need again?” Amanda asks. “Did you want to ride?”

Edition details

• Publisher: Tin House Books
• Publication date: 2022
• Language: English
• ISBN 10: 1953534155
• ISBN 13: 9781953534156
• Binding: Hardcover
• Number of pages: 280