Can Love Last?: The Fate of Romance over Time (Norton Professional Books (Paperback))

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9780393323733: Can Love Last?: The Fate of Romance over Time (Norton Professional Books (Paperback))

"A beautiful and brilliant reexamination of love and its perils."―Barbara Fisher, Boston Globe

Common wisdom has it that love is fragile, but leading psychoanalyst Stephen A. Mitchell argues that romance doesn't actually diminish in long-term relationships―it becomes increasingly dangerous. What we regard as the transience of love is really risk management. Mitchell shows that love can endure, if only we become aware of our self-destructive efforts to protect ourselves from its risks. "Those who read this book will love more wisely because of it."―Andrew Solomon, author of The Noonday Demon "[A] work on romance that is rich and multi-layered."―Publishers Weekly "Cheerful, open, and humane―you'd definitely have wanted him as your analyst."―Judith Shulevitz, The New York Times Book Review "[T]houghtful, compassionate, and profoundly optimistic."―JoAnn Gutin, Salon.com

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Review:

To delve into the subject of love with relational psychologist Stephen A. Mitchell is to race headfirst into an enormous haystack with a kid who's intent on finding not one, but probably a dozen, needles. In Can Love Last? Mitchell's boyish curiosity and profound intelligence virtually set fire to the subject, both enlightening and challenging his readers. Mitchell's premise is that romance, in its many forms, is key to a life worth living.

Why, then, does the sizzle so often fizzle, especially in committed relationships? More importantly, what forces compel humans to actively douse romantic flames in favor of more "stable" love? Mitchell's probings of these and other questions take him on a fascinating journey through times and topics historical as well as contemporary. From Plato to Freud, Homer to Kris Kristofferson, Mitchell weaves history, philosophy, literature, and (of course) psychology into a surprisingly sensible pattern. Yes, a few loud threads stand out, including his well-supported theory that "stable" love is actually much riskier than romance. But over all, differing theories on love and desire, stability and adventure, or surrender and control find more parallels than crossroads under Mitchell's tender care, making this book an intellectual gift to the masses. --Liane Thomas

About the Author:

Stephen A. Mitchell died in 2000 at the pinnacle of his career as a theorist and clinician. He is the author of Freud and Beyond.

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Book Description WW Norton Co, United States, 2003. Paperback. Book Condition: New. Reprint. Language: English . Brand New Book. Common wisdom has it that love is fragile, but leading psychoanalyst Stephen A. Mitchell argues that romance doesn t actually diminish in long-term relationships-it becomes increasingly dangerous. What we regard as the transience of love is really risk management. Mitchell shows that love can endure, if only we become aware of our self-destructive efforts to protect ourselves from its risks. Those who read this book will love more wisely because of it. -Andrew Solomon, author of The Noonday Demon [A] work on romance that is rich and multi-layered. -Publishers Weekly Cheerful, open, and humane-you d definitely have wanted him as your analyst. -Judith Shulevitz, The New York Times Book Review [T]houghtful, compassionate, and profoundly optimistic. -JoAnn Gutin, Bookseller Inventory # AAS9780393323733

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